My Thesis Journey

The end of the road...

2008-12-03T08:19:00.002-06:00

I have been, quite possibly, the most negligent blogger. So, my deepest apologies to everyone. However... I have BIG NEWS!!

Sunday evening, I received an email from the Thesis Director informing me that my thesis has been APPROVED!!!

I am officially Dr. Amy Stewart. WHAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOO!

At this point, I will be printing the thesis up and mailing it to the thesis formatter and once the thesis is formatted perfectly, I will print multiple copies on cotton paper and mail it to the school for binding. Graduation is in June.

Holy Moly! I can't believe that I actually made it this far. Words cannot describe the relief, excitement, giddiness, joy, and wonder that I feel right now.

At this point, I'm not sure what to do about blogging. Part of me thinks I should take my horrible track record as a sign that perhaps I'm just a blog reader, and part of me thinks I should actually blog more, now that I'm not trying to write a thesis. Over the next few weeks I'm going to think and pray about that. If I do decide to continue blogging, a new blog will most likely be formed, and I'll announce that from here. If not, then my blogosphere presence will live on in comments on others blogs.

That being said, I want to thank you for taking the time to follow along with me on this journey. It has been a life changing process for me. The journey has taught me many things about worship, about working with people, about myself. I take with me deep relationships, wonderful memories, some bitterness and a tad more cynicism, a lot of hope for the future, and many more questions than when I started.

For now, I'm going to play some Sudoku and sleep in on Friday :)

WHOOT!!!!

2008-09-01T23:14:00.004-05:00

I just emailed to my thesis supervisor the first draft of THE ENTIRE THESIS! Ok, so at this point it's like 30 pages over the projected page count and I'm sure there's lots of cuts to make. And, ok, so now I have to do the appendicies, but OMG!!! I can't believe I even made it this far.

Let me tell you, there were many times that I was ready to quit. In fact, the only reason I got to this point is because my husband wouldn't let me quit, no way, no sir, no how. He's worked me through quite a few temper tantrums, nervous breakdowns, and icky dark depressive moments. God bless him! And, he's corrected a few split infinitives, misspellings (I some how always wrote asses instead of assess), and the like.

there's lots of work to be done, but the hard part is past. The rest (I'm hoping) is just clean up. Getting this thing down on paper was enough to send me over the edge permanently. Here's a clip from Chapter One:

Let all the world in ev’ry corner sing,

My God and King!

The heav’ns are not too high,

His praise may thither flie:

The earth is not too low,

His praises there may grow.

Let all the world in ev’ry corner sing,

My God and King!

The church with psalms must shout,

No doore can keep them out:

But above all, the heart

Must bear the longest part.

Let all the world in ev’ry corner sing,

My God and King

George Herbert, in his poem, Antiphon, speaks a truth that resonates within me – “The church with psalms must shout, no doore can keep them out.” When I imagine a church whose doors are busted open by shouted psalms, I see a group of people, working together, joyfully and busily worshiping, focused as one on a single task – praising God (Neh. 8:5-6). The congregants come to worship with intention, expecting to encounter the living God. Their worship is not unlike the stories of the people of God in the Bible who encounter God in a physical, tangible way, leaving with their lives changed (Acts 2:1-4). My imaginary congregation worships as a community, their services are rich with symbols and deep with meaning, each person bringing their unique gifts to the table. The work of this congregation is in response to God’s call on their lives, full of thanksgiving for the gift of Jesus Christ and empowered by the Holy Spirit. With the focus I imagine in that church, there is no room for individuals to wait around for someone else to do the praising. Missing from this congregation is a “what’s in it for me” attitude. Each member is a minister in the royal priesthood (1 Pet. 2:9). The leaders are not priests, doing the work on behalf of the congregation, but encouragers and equippers, helping each person fulfill their ministry for the edification of the Church, and most importantly for the glory of God.

When we practice full participation in worship we learn how to fully participate in life. When we practice giving all of ourselves to God in worship, we learn how to give all of ourselves to God in all of life. Worship is first and foremost about and directed to God (scriptural reference). What we “get out of it” in terms of good feelings or self-improvement should not come into play. The benefits we derive from worship are ultimately not for our use or purpose, but for God’s glory. The act of remembering by practicing God’s story in worship helps us to live lives that are pleasing to God. That kind of life is joyful and rewarding for sure, but those aspects are tangential benefits to their ultimate purpose of glorifying God.

Newsletter Article

2008-08-01T10:11:00.002-05:00

This is an article that was just published in our church's newsletter. Thought I'd share it here since it is somewhat related to my thesis.

Let all the world in ev'ry corner sing,

My God and King.

The heav'ns are not too high,

His praise may thither flie:

The earth is not too low,

His praises there may grow.

Let all the world in ev'ry corner sing,

My God and King.

The church with psalms must shout,

No doore can keep them out:

But above all, the heart

Must bear the longest part.

Let all the world in ev'ry corner sing,

My God and King.

This is a poem by George Herbert titled Antiphon. It is part of the larger work by Herbert written in 1633, titled The Temple. I mention this poem because just a few days ago, I decided that it was the very text that I wanted painted on my office wall. The idea of having a scripture verse or some other inspirational text painted on my wall as a constant reminder of my focus and purpose here at WPC is intriguing to me. This text has long been a favorite of mine (in fact, I walked down the isle to marry my sweet Jack to Vaughan Williams’ setting), though I couldn’t quite put a finger on it as to why it spoke so deeply to me. Until last week.

As many of you know, I am currently deep in the mire and muck of writing my doctoral thesis. This process has forced me to think and rethink my task and purpose, both of the thesis specifically and of my calling in general. Thesis writing can sometimes drag you down and trick you into believing that it doesn’t matter or that your work is inconsequential. But then, words like these from George Herbert will come from seemingly nowhere and turn the light back on. Ok, so sometimes it’s the tiniest dot of light far in the distance, but light, nonetheless.

As I was working in my office, trying to reclaim it from a year of my disorganization, I realized that this was the text I wanted on my wall, especially the refrain and second verse. Why the second verse? Because my tiny dot of light is found in those words: The church with psalms must shout, no doore can keep them out: But above all, the heart must bear the longest part.

The first half of the verse speaks to the community. We, as a community known as the Body of Christ must shout out our psalms of praise, of thanksgiving, of confession, of lament, of glory to God. If we don’t praise God, the very rocks will cry out – and, in fact, they do! The Church with Psalms joins all creation in praising God. This is the very focus of my thesis – helping our church praise God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

The second half of the verse speaks to the individual heart. Each of us is created, loved and called by God, freed and forgiven by Jesus’ death and resurrection, and empowered to live in grace by the Holy Spirit. Our relationship with God is personal. O Lord, you have searched me and known me. Psalm 139. As we worship together as a community, we each must add our individual voices to the song.

Therefore, individually, each of us must cultivate our relationship with God. And, I believe God is calling each of us to be a part of the Church as it shouts out the Psalms! This is the essence of my calling here at WPC and the focus of my thesis – helping this church praise God with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs.

As we fly headlong into the busy fall, perhaps this poem will encourage you to consider both your personal relationship with Jesus, and your involvement in the life of this community of Christ. Take a quick glance through this publication, and you’ll be amazed at the many ways in which you can plug into the life of this family. Your heart will be strengthened and your relationship with Jesus will grow. Will you join with us as we shout our Psalms to God in worship, in bible studies, in small groups, in musical ensembles, in mission teams, and through leadership opportunities?

The most negletful blogger ever

2008-08-01T10:03:00.002-05:00

wow, I've not posted since March 14th. That's pretty sorry, huh? anyway, just wanted to update the very few readers left (if there are any) that I'm making progress, finally, on the thesis. I took a week last month off from work and went out to a ranch house outside of town (one of our church members' ranch). My husband was with me and we set a plan for the week, and each day, and I was able to write about 40 pages. Not all of that will be usable, for sure, but it sure felt good. I've turned Chapter 3 in to my adviser, and hope to have more to turn into him after this next week. Sunday afternoon, I'll be heading out to an Abbey about 45 min. away and will live with a bunch of monks for a week. Hoping for the same kind of success out there. No internet, no phone calls, no distractions.

I'll try to follow the schedule of the monks:
5:30 rising bell
6:00 Vigils
6:35-7:15 breakfast, silence and Lectio
7:15 Lauds
8:00 - 12:00 work period
12:05 midday prayer
12:15-12:45 lunch
1:00 - 4:30 work period
5:00 Eucharist (though, not being Catholic, I'm sure I'll not be able to partake)
5:45 Dinner followed by Recreation
6:45 Vespers in Church

We'll see how closely I'm able to follow that schedule. But, I think it will be a very focused, calm, and spiritually renewing time for me.

I probably won't post until after next week, but at least you know that I haven't given up yet.

a little thesis excerpt

2008-03-14T11:54:00.003-05:00

Here's a bit of what I've been working on lately, though it's definitely not a finished product yet. So, read it as such and if you have any suggestions, comments, corrections or whatever, I'd love to hear them.
(The proper footnotes in the word document do not translate to blog form, so I included links to the books on Amazon along with the page numbers).

My vows to thee I must perform, O God;
I will render thank offerings to thee.
For thou has delivered my soul from death,
Yea, my feet from falling,
That I may walk before God in the light of life (Psalm 56:12-13)

The psalmist illustrates in Psalm 56 the reciprocal nature of the relationship between God and his people: God initiates a relationship with us, we respond to God in faith and by following his commandments. The very basic component of our life with God as well as worship is this dialogue between God’s initiation and our response to God. “The starting point for authentic participation is the individual Christian’s own heartfelt and genuine response of praise and thanksgiving before the presence of God.” (Craig Douglas Erickson, Participating in Worship, 3) Worship as dialogue requires participation, as the word ‘response’ implies an action. Emily Brink suggests that this principle of worship as dialogue “provides a useful corrective to the conviction that worship is a purely human activity and that worshipers are merely passive spectators rather than vital participants in an active engagement with God.” (Emily Brink, Authentic Worship in a Changing Culture, 6)

Harold Best expands on the understanding that worship is not merely a human activity. He defines worship as “the continuous outpouring of all that I am and all that I do and all that I can ever become in the light of a chosen or choosing god.” (Harold Best, Unceasing Worship, 18) It is not that we were created for worship or made to worship but simply that we worship. Worship is an inherent trait as beings created in the image of God. A trait that is built into our very DNA as the way we were created undermines the idea of worship as a human act. Whether we worship God or an idol, we worship. Not only do we worship, but in Best’s definition, the phrase ‘continuous outpouring’ gives a specific quality to that worship. Continuous outpouring conveys a sense intense activity on the part of the worshiper. Notice that Best’s definition does not specify that this continuous outpouring is automatically and always directed to God, the rightful recipient of our worship. Instead, we are always bowing down either to God who is always choosing us and whom we in turn choose, or we bow down to something else which may in fact hold us completely captive. We would do well to examine where we find continuous outpouring in our lives. Is our worship directed to God or to some idol? What might our worship look like if it were directed toward God?

Defining participation in corporate worship is an elusive task. Worshipers can outwardly appear to be participating in an action. In one congregation, this may take the shape of raised hands, robust singing, dancing, and an outward expression of emotion. In another congregation, this may take the shape of kneeling, genuflecting, crossing oneself. Worshipers can also outwardly appear to be not participating. Perhaps they sit quietly, choose not to sing the songs or hymns, and maintain a reserved air about themselves. It is possible, however, that those who are outwardly demonstrative in their worship may just be ‘going through the motions’ or joining with the crowd. Outward-only worship is the very thing God cries out against in Isaiah 29:13-14: “The Lord said: because these people draw near to me with their mouths and honor me with their lips, while their hearts are far from me, and their worship is of a human commandment learned by rote; so I will again do amazing things with this people, shocking and amazing. The wisdom of their wise shall perish, and the discernment of the discerning shall be hidden.”

It is also possible to be highly engaged in worship, though not visibly so. Take for instance the person who sits with eyes closed during a congregational song. Perhaps they are choosing to disengage from the action, or perhaps they are worshiping deep in their hearts, moved to silence and stillness. “But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him!” Habakkuk 2:20

To some extent, we can dismiss any discussion of participation as purely conjectural. No one knows what happens in one person’s heart except for that person and God. But, in our very humanness we are more than mere thoughts or spirits. We are physical beings who experience our world in a physical reality. We know each other in physical ways, and survive in the world in a physical body; a physical body that was created by God. Not only are we physical and experience the world in a physical reality, worship involves more than just the individual and God. The dialogic nature of worship, of our response to God’s initiation, happens within the context of community. We do not dialogue with God in a vacuum, but with each other.
Participation, according to Constance Cherry means to take part in; to share in; to partner in. She goes on further to look at what it means to be a partner. To be a partner, one shares or takes part in with another. A partner is also one who dances with another, or can be a player on the same side in a game. Participation, from this perspective, is clearly not an individual activity. “What would happen if we came in and decided that God has called us to be a partner to one another in the community of faith to assist them in their experience of worship that day?” (Constance Cherry, From Passive to Participative Worship, audio [at about 17:20] from Calvin Symposium on Worship 2006)

Simon Chan, in Liturgical Theology: The Church as Worshiping Community affirms the thin ice one walks on when trying to define participation in worship. “The complexity of trying to determine what constitutes active participation should make us wary of simplistic solutions to the worship crisis affecting the church.”(Simon Chan, Liturgical Theology, 151) He proposes, however, a few broad principles that can lead to [better?] active participation in worship. First, within the various elements of liturgy, including prayers, acclamations, physical postures, music, psalmody, and liturgical space and decoration, there are many opportunities for active participation. Second, whatever choices are made for the liturgy, such as what hymns or melodies, what types of physical postures, or the amount of silence in a given service, the people’s understanding, their preparation, their specific sets of gifts and abilities and their particular needs must be taken into account. “In other words, active participation is possible if the people understand what is going on, are inwardly prepared and are able to use their gifts in the worship service.” (Chan, 152)

My first sermon

2008-03-12T00:10:00.002-05:00

Ok, here's my very first sermon. It's just a short homily - about 8 min. in length. Tomorrow at 12:15 I'll be leading the 5th Lenten worship Service. These 6 Wednesdays throughout Lent and Good Friday are all on the theme of the 7 Last Words of Christ. "Hope in Troubled Times: Contemporary Reflection on the Last Words of Christ." My title is: "I Thirst: Hope for Social Justice in the Face of Human Privation"

More than half of her body is made of it, approximately 55%. She needs about a gallon of it a day. If she were to go more than 5 days without it, she would die. Her name is Kelemwa. She’s a mother of 4 children, and lives in rural Ethiopia. She and her children walk over an hour a day to carry this precious cargo - water. You need just as much water as she, but there’s a big difference in her life. Her water comes from a river, the closest water source to her home. The river is also used by cattle and wild animals that contaminate the river. During the dry season, the river dries up to barely a trickle, or completely disappears. Her family often becomes sick with diarrhea from the dirty water and there is never enough water to use for sanitation and personal hygiene.

There are a billion other stories like hers. That is not an exaggeration. One in six people in the world do not have access to an adequate water supply.

Water – it surrounds us, it is a building block of life. Without it, we die. Human suffering around the world is profoundly connected to a lack of good, clean and sufficient amounts of water. Clearly, you need it, I need it, Kelemwa needs it, Jesus needed it.

In the last moments of his life here on earth, Jesus thirsted. He cried out for a drink. Why did he cry out for thirst? This was God! God, who makes the rain to fall on the earth, who created the great and small rivers of the world, who covered this planet with life giving water. God, who formed the earth with his hands from the deep, from the waters. God was thirsty! If Jesus had asked for it, the angels would have supplied him with the most satisfying cup of cold water.

But, this was also Man. Jesus was fully God and perhaps most at this moment in time, most fully Man. And he knew it. He knew that for the scriptures to be fulfilled, he must suffer this life ending thirst. Jesus experienced to the depth what it is to be human. He knew what it was like to be homeless, to be a refugee, to be hungry and tired, to be rejected, to be whipped and scorned, to be misunderstood, to be overcome with grief, to be thirsty.

Do we, in our comfortable, North American lives know what it’s like to be thirsty? Perhaps we need to learn what it is to be thirsty, the way Jesus was thirsty, the way more than 1 billion people – men, women and children, are thirsty. Jesus walks along side these people. Are we walking along with them?

Jesus was thirsty, parched and dry in his mouth. He was also thirsty, parched and dry in his soul, for Jesus was separated from God. Jesus descended into hell – what is hell but total separation from God. Jesus was thirsty for the very living water that he offered one day to a woman at a well in Samaria. Not only did Jesus experience the deepest physical thirst that a human can experience, Jesus gave himself up in death, and became separated from God for us.

We are not truly separated from God, the way that Jesus was at that moment. Because of what Jesus suffered on our behalf that day, we have been ushered into the very presence of God, through Jesus Christ. Certainly, each of us has longed for and thirsted for the presence of the Lord. But if we’re truly honest with ourselves, we’ll recognize that when we feel far from God, it is because we have turned away from God.

Jesus’ life was about social justice, about healing, feeding, teaching and loving the rejected and discarded. Jesus also felt first hand the reality of poverty and lack of water to drink. Jesus felt first hand on the cross what it is like to be separated from God. That last drink he took was vinegar. He knew it was vinegar – he drank it anyway, to be obedient to death, even death on the cross. He drank it for us. So that we could drink from the fountain that doesn’t ever run dry. So that our lives are overflowing with the love of Jesus Christ. When we drink from that fountain, our hearts overflow with living water that directs our lives and actions. We cannot but help to share living water, drinking water, food, clothing, shelter with those around us and those far away from us.

Jesus calls us to social justice – not out of obligation, not out of a sense of doing good, or to get some warm and fuzzy feeling in return. No, Jesus fills us to overflowing so that we joyfully and hope-fully share with the least of these. When our joy fills up our cup to overflowing, when our lips can speak no words other than true, when we know that love for simple things is better, then we know that God still goes that road with us, then we know that God still goes that road with us.

Let us pray,
Heavenly Father, giver of life who fills our cups to overflowing, reveal yourself to us as you walk down the road with us. Show us how when we offer a drink of cool refreshing water to one of the least of these, we offer cool refreshing water to thee, Lord God. And just as we offer bitter vinegar to drink to the least of these, we stand with the men at the cross and offer our Lord a sponge soaked with vinegar. Fill our cups to overflowing Lord so that out of our abundance we may share your love, your light, your water with the world, for your glory. In Jesus name, Amen.

Adios March 1st

2008-03-05T09:06:00.002-06:00

Well, March 1st has come and gone. That was the date that I had proposed sending my final draft to my adviser so that I could send the final approved version to my thesis director. I'm not even close to that possibility. But, I'm ok with that. It kinda hit me at about 11:45 pm on Friday night. But, I'm over it now and working at a steady, if slow, pace. I will graduate next summer, and in fact plan to be done with this before the School year starts in September.

Next week, I get to preach for the first time. Not on Sunday, obviously, but we're having mid-week lenten services and I'm preaching for one of them. The theme for these services which will lead up to Good Friday is "Hope in Troubled Times: A Contemporary Reflection on the Seven Last Words of Christ." My word is "I thirst"; Hope for Social Justice in the Face of Human Privation. I'll be talking about Jesus thirsting for water, but also thirsting for the very water that he offered to the woman at the well. He understands our physical and spiritual thirst because he has felt those thirsts first hand. Jesus has walked this way before. And, so, out of our own baptismal waters, the water that Jesus gives us that springs eternal, we are moved to make choices that lead to social justice and not human privation. The need for water is a life making-or -breaking factor in our lives. Motivated by our new life in Christ, how do we act to help others gain access to clean and abundant water - both H2O and spiritual water?

Meanwhile, the writing for the thesis chugs along... slowly but surely.

feeling a little cynical

2008-02-29T10:03:00.002-06:00

As I read about the church in various times of history I sense a great sense of import and of influence upon the lives of the worshipers. People lived and died by the Word of God. Every aspect of life revolved passionately around the Word of God. The history of the world has been impacted time and again by brave souls striving to follow God’s word to the fullest, to worship unceasingly. There have been martyrs in almost every age, including ours. But, there certainly are not many martyrs that I know of in our western society now. Not in late 20th and 21st century America. (There are probably some isolated incidences, and I don’t mean to slight those here.)

Nope, we seem to have all gone to sleep. No longer are we persecuted for our beliefs. You cannot call the barbs we get from the non-religious in our society persecution. No, by persecution, I mean people being burned at the stake; people ostracized by the government and society in a complete and total way; whole groups of people being fed to lions; genocide; etc. But, people in all times and places have had such strong faith that these kinds of threats did not deter them from meeting together as community to worship.

We don’t have threats like this, and thinking about what others have endured for the privilege of worshiping, we should be infinitely thankful for our current lack of threat. However, perhaps because of this lack of threat, we seem to have fallen asleep. Lot’s of people go to church, lead good lives, even spend a significant amount of time and energy within their Body of Christ communities, but still are lackluster. I’m sure there’s a church like that mentioned in Revelation – is it the one that God says that he will spit out of his mouth; the apathetic church? Is that what we’ve become? Is that why our worship is either lackluster or has devolved into mere entertainment? Or are our lives so apathetic and asleep because our worship has become lackluster or mere entertainment? Is that why Paul said we should rejoice in our sufferings? In all things (that’s ALL THINGS, folks) we are to be thankful to God. In some way persecuted Christians are so thankful in their persecution that they continue to risk their very lives to worship God.

Can there be found a group of Christians in America today that would behave like the example of the early church during the Diocletian persecution described by Simon Chan in Liturgical Theology? “There is an inner assurance in their simple assertion. Against the mightiest political power of the day, these Christians’ discovered a greater reality, the power of an unquenchable life, concretized in their worship on the Lord’s Day. Sunday then was not even a public holiday. But for the Christians it was the new point of departure to a new order of existence. So real was it that, like their predecessors in the first century, they felt the inner compulsion to ‘obey God rather than men.’(Acts 5:29)” (Chan, 43). How might our times of corporate worship look if we too “discovered… the power of an unquenchable life?”

Happy Bow Bridge Day

2008-02-15T10:28:00.002-06:00

My husband and I do not celebrate Valentine's Day. No, we celebrate Bow Bridge Day. Four years ago, today, Jack proposed to me on Bow Bridge in Central Park:

I was living in New York at that time, and Jack had come to visit me, as he was living in Texas. I knew that a proposal was coming soon, but didn't know when or how or where. Sunday afternoon, after church, we went for a walk in Central Park. Jack knows that it was my favorite location in the city. I loved walking through the park. It was SOOOOO cold! Oh my goodness, I think it was 22 degrees or something ridiculous like that. Anyway, we came to Bow Bridge and were hanging out, taking pictures and chatting with chattering teeth. After a few minutes Jack reached into his pocket and said, "Hey, I still have my silly putty egg in my pocket. I wonder if silly putty freezes." We had both purchased silly putty eggs on his last trip to New York at the Toys R Us store in central park. We're silly that way :). Anyway, I grabbed the egg from him, curious to see if silly putty did indeed freeze, since EVERYTHING ELSE in the world was frozen at that time! And I opened the egg, and there, perched in the silly putty was a diamond ring! I started squealing and jumping up and down. Jack threw his arms around me and I said to him, "You've got to ask me, you have to ask me!" So he quickly dropped down on one knee, and blurted out really fast, "Will you be my wife?" He then jumped back up and threw his arms around me and I squealed again and said yes about a million times.

2004 was quite a whirlwind of a year for me. And, no offense to any of the guys I've dated in the past, but I'm so thankful to God for bringing Jack and me together. I love you honey!

Friday Five: The Water and the Word

2008-02-15T10:02:00.002-06:00

The latest Friday Five is brought to us by RevHRod

In this Sunday's gospel Nicodemus asks Jesus, "How can anyone be born after having grown old? Can one enter a second time into the mother's womb and be born?" Poor old Nicodemus! He was so confused about the whole "water and Spirit" business of baptism.

For today's five, tell us about your baptismal experiences.

When and where were you baptized? Do you remember it? Know any interesting tidbits? I was baptized on Palm Sunday, March 31st 1985. Sixth grade was the age youth were baptized in our church (Disciples of Christ). I remember the experience vividly. We attended "Pastor's Class" for the whole year, culminating in a weekend retreat the week before Palm Sunday. Both of my parents were out of the country at the time, on tour in Japan with the Texas Boys Choir, so I had an adopted 'mom' who was there with me that day, one of the members of the congregation. First, we were asked, one at a time by the Senior Minister (Rev. Pennybacker) the traditional baptismal questions and gave our statement of faith, and then robed up in white robes and were baptized. Even more memorable was our first communion on Maundy Thursday later that week. I'll never forget that night - it was a communion service followed by a Service of Tenebrae. It was quite the full and rich experience for a young 6th grader.
What's the most unexpected thing you've ever witnessed at a baptism? the first time I attended a Pentecostal service was in 10th grade. It was a Sunday evening service and they were having a baptism. That was most unusual for me as I was used to the more reserved and organized baptisms of the Disciples church - highly participatory though they were. At this service, only one person was being baptized and they were an adult (wasn't everyone baptized in the 6th grade?!?). The actual baptism also took about 30 min. as they stayed in the bath for quite a while while people cried and sang and prayed and danced around. It was almost scary to me. But, there was no doubt in my mind that she was definitely baptized!
Does your congregation have any special traditions surrounding baptisms? Now that I serve in a Presbyterian congregation, it's almost always infant baptisms. Our (relatively) new pastor has added a really cool thing to the baptism event in our worship services. After the actual baptism, he'll walk with the baby up and down the center isle and ask those seated on the ends of the rows to reach out and touch the baby as a symbol of our connectedness in the Body of Christ. I think it's a good, though small, step in teaching our congregation about how the water rite is just the beginning of a relationship as a family and that the vows we say at that rite are more than just fluff. We're working in many different areas of the church life to help people continue to live out those vows.
Are you a godparent or baptismal sponsor? Have a story to tell? Nope, but I'd love to be one.
Do you have a favorite baptismal song or hymn? I Was There to Hear Your Borning Cry. We don't really ever sing baptismal songs in our worship as many times the baptism isn't really central to the service, just one part. That's definitly something I'd like to see changed, however. I would love to see our church adopt a policy of baptizing on certain Sundays, leading to many children being baptized at the same time, as well as the whole service focusing on those baptisms. That, I think, would be another step in making Baptism a more significant event in the life of our church. Maybe someday...

A Good Day

2008-02-07T23:07:00.000-06:00

Today was a really good day. By all accounts, I should be exhausted, and in fact, I am. Every day this week has been 12 hours work days, and continuing to work at night. Today, even though I was at work for more than 12 hours, was a great day and I came home with a big smile on my face.

The day started with preparation for a lecture to be given at lunch. Then, once I got to the church, I spent most of the morning getting the projector set up and running through my lecture one more time. Additionally, I spent some time visiting with various people at the church and proofing the bulletins. Then, I gave my lecture to the Hannah Circle. They asked me to talk to them about worship. Well, that's wide open! So, I talked first about various definitions of worship, inviting discussion from the group. Then, I gave an overview of some worship themes in the Bible (God initiates through an event, out of that event develops a covenant, and worship is the outward manifestation of that covenant, etc.), talked about the many words in the OT that are translated as worship and how they are all highly active verbs, and finished off the talk with some words about how our worship can be active as well, and should be, yada yada yada. Anyway, it was kinda cobbled together from my thesis work. It was a nice time - just 8 ladies, but I mentioned to them that one of the things I've learned through this project is that I cannot change the whole congregation in 5 Sundays. However, we can learn and grow and change through one-on-one relationships and through small groups like this one.

After that lecture, I had another meeting - the Guild. These are the very helpful ladies who keep the candles full, iron the paraments, set up the sanctuary for the various services, keep the pew racks neat and clean, coordinate the flowers and create banners and other art in the worship space. It was, surprisingly a productive meeting.

Next, I met with one of our new Elders to work with him on the Scripture reading for this coming Sunday. Each of our Elders serves as a worship leader about 7 times a year, offering the Prayer for Illumination and then reading the Scripture passage for the day. I'm the one responsible for making sure they know what to do, and how to do it, etc. He was really great to work with and when I helped him for a while, he asked if he could stay and practice some more. An hour later he was still at it! Just earlier in the day someone had commented to me how much they appreciated how much time and effort our lay worship leaders put into their service. Since that falls under my duties, hearing that makes me very happy. I know that our lay leaders work hard and that through their work they are being spiritually transformed just as much, if not more, than those they lead in worship.

After that, I worked some more on the bulletin, and actually was able to spend some time... gasp!... practicing!! Which was nice since we were starting some work on Worthy Is the Lamb from Messiah. Certainly not the most difficult thing to play from Messiah, but definitely deserving of some woodshedding before trying to play for choir rehearsal.

This evening, when I finally got home at 9:30, I walked through all of this with my husband and he listened patiently. I was positively giddy while going through my day and was surprised that what was such a long day had left me in such good spirits. He pointed out to me that all these things that I described doing and being in charge of today were a direct result of what I have learned through IWS and this degree program. He is absolutely correct! The only thing I did today that was not related to what I've studied and learned over the past 3 years was playing for choir rehearsals.

So, even though I'm cursing the process right now and wanting to be done with the blasted thing, I have to realize that it has given me so much and taught me more than I'll ever realize. So, thank you IWS. Thank you Bob Webber. Thank you to all my wonderful teachers and classmates. You made my day :)

Tag: Page 123

2008-02-01T08:28:00.000-06:00

I have been tagged by Tripp.

The Rules:-
Pick up the nearest book of 123 pages or more. (No cheating!)
Find Page 123.
Find the first 5 sentences.
Post the next 3 sentences.
Tag 5 people.

Ok, so I'm cheating a little bit. When I first read Tripp's blog, the nearest book was some Star Wars book that my husband was reading. But, I didn't actually complete the tag then. So, now, I'm sitting in the study... studying :). And the nearest book has this to say on page 123:

Another refuge for a small, beleaguered people? To Isaiah, this was pernicious. The times might well be menacing and the prospect of recovering independent sovereignty enticing, but all the security Zion and its people needed was the in the Lord.

That is from the Tyndale Old Testament Commentary on Isaiah. This particular snippet is from a comment on Isaiah 14:28-32. Not sure why that book was on top of my book pile as I've not used it in a while. I think I must have inverted the pile yesterday as I was looking for another particular book.

So, now to tag 5 people:
Sally
JayAre
Lisa
Leah
PH

Post in the comments if you played...

Some more thoughts...

2008-02-01T08:20:00.000-06:00

Psalm 55:12-13
My vows to thee I must perform, O God;
I will render thank offerings to thee.
For thou has delivered my soul from death,
Yea, my feet from falling,
That I may walk before God in the light of life.

That first line could be read with an attitude of drudgery and obligation (in a bad way). But, instead I hear great joy in that statement. Like the joy of my dog Trent when I pet him and shower him with attention. He is almost beside himself with joy, he can’t control himself when he gets going. He just wants to lick my face and jump up on me and starts barking at me and starts running around like crazy. He’s so happy that I love him. Or like my neighbor's well behaved Labs. They will willingly sit still and wait because they know you love them. They’ll do all kinds of tricks and obey well in response to the love you’ve shown them in the past. This first line of this Psalm is like a happy, loved animal. The Psalmist is so filled with joy and love that he wants only to worship God. Not because he has been told to or else he’ll get some punishment, but in an uncontrollable response to God’s faithfulness.

What if we each came into worship every week with this kind of response? What if each person in the pew was responding with worship to the God of love, instead of going through the motions to get something, or worse, expecting to get something for doing absolutely nothing – just out of a sense of entitlement? Is that why we’re passive? We pay our money, we wear the right clothes and appear in the right places – we’re entitled to get something and we don’t want to have to work for it during this hour out of our busy lives. We’ve been working hard all week, now it’s “my time.” Is worship “my time” for many people? Perhaps the idea of Sabbath perpetuates this thought? Sabbath is thought of as “my time” to refresh and rejuvenate instead of a time to stop and reflect and focus on God. But wait, didn’t Jesus say that Sabbath was for us? Perhaps it is a time to refresh, relax and rejuvenate. If that’s the case, then is Sunday worship a part of that? Or is Sunday worship separate from Sabbath? The early Christians still observed Sabbath, and worshiped on Sunday (a work day). They didn’t see Sunday as the 7th day of the week as the Sabbath is the 7th day of the week. No, they saw it as the 1st/8th day of the week – the day God created light, and the day God recreated Light. So, perhaps Sunday worship was not a part of Sabbath, because Sunday worship was for God and is work, it is the work we do for God. It’s not the only work we do for God, but it is the work of worship.

What I'm thinking about today

2008-01-21T10:51:00.000-06:00

Worship at its core is participatory. The very basic component of worship is that of God’s action and our response. So often, worship turns into an event where a few people do a whole lot of acting and a whole lot of people watch. This would be a fundamental difference between worship and entertainment. So, why does worship seem to frequently degrade into entertainment?
Perhaps entertainment is not the right word. Perhaps that’s just the form that passive worship has taken in our time. Was the passive worship that pervaded the Christian world throughout the Middle Ages a form of entertainment? That was less about mere entertainment and more about fulfilling a supposed duty imposed by someone else. The duty or duties were not performed because it was a law. The people had been successfully convinced that these duties would buy their way out of the burning fires of damnation. Worship had become an act of propitiation. Worship was no longer an act of thanksgiving. The Christian life was no longer a Eucharistic one. And isn’t that kind of worship the very kind that had such a death grip on the people when Jesus came into our world: worship as propitiation instead of thanksgiving? There are plenty of examples in the Old Testament of worship that was full of thanksgiving. So, again worship had degraded from thanksgiving to propitiation.
In our current times, instead of worship as propitiation imposed by the Pharisees or the Roman Church, worship has degraded from thanksgiving into entertainment. The shift from thanksgiving to entertainment, just as it has been in the past, is a slow and mostly innocent process. In times past, at least, we could point with blaming fingers to certain people and/or groups of people. But, entertainment, and the cultural mentality surrounding it is much more sly and subversive. It’s much more difficult to find the problem and root it out.

I will survive... I think

2008-01-19T21:13:00.000-06:00

Hello out there. I hope everyone hasn't given up on me. Sally, thank you for asking how I'm doing. That is such a blessing to me to know that you and others are pulling for me right now. Here's how it goes: slowly and painfully. I've come to the realization that I probably will not finish in time to graduate this June. For that to happen, I have to have everything turned into my adviser by March 1st. Unless I figure out how to stop time between now and then, I'm pretty sure I won't have it done. It doesn't help that Lent and Easter are SO. FREAKING. EARLY. THIS. YEAR!

It seems that I've spent a lot of time getting worked up over trying to accomplish this project instead of just doing the work and so I've managed to build it up in my head as this huge insurmountable task. My study times tend to involve me staring at my computer screen for long periods of time, punctuated by email checking and web surfing. In the process of psyching myself out, I've also managed to wear down my immune system, so for the first time in 15 years I've been sick. Since December 28th. I'm not exaggerating that it's been 15 years, it really has. I can't remember the last time I ran a fever, or produced this amount green gunk. I so want to have my life back.

Anyway, one day at a time, right? Today, I sent to my adviser part of Chapter 2 - 20 pages of it. Just so he can see where I am and make sure I'm on track. And, if a day goes by that I just don't have the emotional energy to work on it, then I won't and I won't beat myself up for it. Some days, even if I have 2 hours at the end of it to study, there's just nothing left inside.

so, that's how I am.

If you're at all interested, you can view what I've written so far on my google pages site. click here and then follow the link to Chapter2Jan1908.pdf.

Keep praying for me. God is faithful and just, his mercies are new every morning.

thoughts from the trenches

2007-11-30T16:27:00.000-06:00

What I set out to do, what I hoped to accomplish, and still hope to accomplish is not what we did. We did not reach that lofty goal that everyone warned me was too big, to far reaching to reach in one project. Well, at least not for the whole congregation. What I hope to do, hope to influence at whatever congregation God has placed me is to teach the members that worship can be vital, life changing, spiritually deep, welcoming to new believers and seekers, sustaining of long time followers and ultimately pleasing and glorifying to God. It is rather distressing to hear from people who have come to worship the last 5 weeks complain about things they ‘didn’t like’ or comment that worship is supposed to be one way or the other. It is disheartening that I have been unable to teach every person who walks through those doors. But, that’s not what God has called me or anyone to do. It’s not by large numbers and masses of people that the word of God is spread, not by easy formulas or a particular worship order; the right hymn coupled with the right prayer, enhanced with the right symbol or other visual aid. It is through relationship and community. One person sharing with one person about God, faith, worship, the work of the people. I shared with 13 people throughout this project my passion for God’s worship, for the work of the people. Perhaps 13 people have come to understand more fully that “every congregation has the potential to worship in a way that is vital to the lives of those who participate: worship of spiritual depth that encourages the growth in faith of its participants, reaches out to and welcomes new participants into faith, and sends people out as the Body of Christ to transform the world.” (The Work of the People, Gilbert, 3.) I know this project is specifically about participation and that is what I will be measuring. But, I cannot think about this project, write about it, proceed with it without keeping in mind a hope for the future. It is more than participation. That is one piece to this amazing and complicated puzzle.

As I write these daily reflections to spurn on my creativity and writing, I will keep coming back to this idea. It is so much more than participation. I will not stifle my thoughts about that here like I will have to in the paper.

Perhaps after this project is finished, I will continue to study and write. If I do, my next project will be specifically on the order of worship – it’s history through the church, how it changed in events of the Protestant Reformation, the American Frontier, the Modern Era and now into the Postmodern Era as the widespread and ecumenical worship renewal has changed the face of worship for almost all denominations and sects.

In the readings I’ve done for this project and in fact for this whole degree there is this amazing sense of hope and positive outlook for worship, for bringing in new and old ideas, for worshiping so completely as the Body of Christ. But, in the trenches, it’s a different story. Here in the day to day, Sunday to Sunday world of planning and leading worship services, not everyone is happy and hopeful. Not every idea takes off and touches peoples lives and lifts people to deeper faith and action. Many ideas and choices leave people feeling alienated and alone, grumpy and needy. I can preach all day long that worship is not about us, it’s about God and that we should be concerned about what God wants and what is good for God, instead of our selfish selves. But, that will never change the fact that the people of God are hungry, just like the rest of the world and needs do need to be met. If we can’t meet needs in the Body of Christ, people (myself included) will look elsewhere. How do we balance this need for spiritual nourishment and love with the need to serve God and the world above ourselves? No matter how beautiful and perfectly crafted a liturgy is, when someone walks out of worship feeling alone, alienated, frustrated and upset for whatever reason, we have failed.

God of light and love, of worship and liturgy, of our lives and very being, come quickly, come. We desire so much to serve you, even if we don’t really know it. But, at ever turn, we fail, we falter. Keep picking us up and pushing us on so that we may strive to do your will. We’ll never be able to do it perfectly in this world, there will be tears and seas of tears until you come again. But that doesn’t excuse us from trying to reach your goal. Show us glimpses of your kingdom so that we may continue to trek on to that great and glorious day. Forgive us for alienating and hurting our brothers and sisters along with way. All this we pray in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen

Five Things I'm Thankful For Meme

2007-11-23T11:18:00.000-06:00

Sally tagged me to do this meme. Five things I'm thankful for, and this week being Thanksgiving Week, it is a timely post. There are many things I'm thankful for, so it's hard to narrow it down to five. But, I'll do my best:

1. I'm really thankful for my family, and especially my dear sweet husband. I tried finding that perfect mate on my own, and was wholly unsuccessful at that pursuit. When I finally let go and left it up to God, Jack walked into my life. God was pretty smart when He came up with that idea :).

2. Cool, crisp fall days. Really, the cycle of seasons. I love the natural cyclical changes in weather. Texas never really had four distinct seasons, and Oklahoma is only slightly better. When I lived in New York City, there were four beautiful, distinct seasons. I really miss that. A friend of mine used to live in Hawaii, and I was so jealous. I thought there could be nothing better than living where the weather is beautiful all year long. But, he told me that he thought the same thing too until he lived there for a few years. He said that not having a regular cycle of seasons really messes with your own cycles.

3. The Robert E. Webber Institute for Worship Studies. This program has been life changing for me and I will be ever thankful to Tim for introducing me to it, to my church for financially supporting me in this endeavor and to all my instructors and classmates for countless, unnameable gifts.

4. Music - without it, my life would not be.

5. Worship - God has given us such a gift in worship, and especially in things like Baptism and the Lord's Supper. I know that worship is first and foremost for and about God, and not what we want or get out of it. But, when it really is first and foremost for and about God, then what we do get out of it is beyond anything we could every think of to want for ourselves.

There are so many more things to be thankful for, and I hope that I can remember that every day. My life would be so different if I really did live a more Eucharistic life each and every day. So, I will try again today, and hopefully remember to do it again tomorrow. Perhaps over time I'll get better at it - only through God's grace.

I'm not sure there are 5 bloggers who read my blog regularly, but I'll try :). I tag Val, Jack, Tripp, Lisa and Ann (Ann, I don't know your blog address, so you'll have to give it to me). Ok, now you five need to post your five thankful things, let me know here at my blog when you've done it and then, let us all know over at Sally's blog so we can see all the many things we're thankful for

Post Thanksgiving Day Friday Five

2007-11-23T10:28:00.000-06:00

Singing Owl brings us this tryptophan induced Friday Five:

Ah, the day after Thanksgiving--groan! Fortunately, I love Thanksgiving leftovers.

Thanksgiving is the American holiday when the greatest number of people travel somewhere else to celebrate. I am posting this from my son’s home in Minnesota where we are recovering from the food shopping and the preparations and the meal and the clean up. It is difficult to think of anything requiring much energy today, and I am enjoying my sweet baby granddaughter, so I will keep it simple. For those of you not in the USA, I apologize for the nationalistic tone of this Friday Five!

1. Did you go elsewhere for the day, or did you have visitors at your place instead? How was it? My husband and I traveled on Tuesday to Houston (we're still here) to spend thanksgiving with Jack's Parents. Jack's dad is a minister at a Disciples of Christ church down here. Dan (Jack's brother) and Tiffany and their precious little girl, Maya, is here too. We're having a grand 'ole time, doing puzzles, playing with the baby, laughing at all the dogs, sleeping and generally being wonderfully lazy. I've got the best in-laws in the world!

2. Main course: If it was the turkey, the whole turkey, and nothing but the turkey, was it prepared in an unusual way? Or did you throw tradition to the winds and do something different? I've actually never had such wonderful, juicy turkey in all my life. Jack comes by his cooking talents very naturally. We had turkey with turkey gravy as well as a pineapple gravy; cranberry sauce, stuffing, sweet potato souffle, ambrosia, corn on the cob, carrot salad, rolls and homemade pumpkin pie. Then for dinner we ate popcorn at the movies. I'm sure lunch today will be turkey sandwiches.

3. Other than the meal, do you have any Thanksgiving customs that you observe every year? Well, before I married Jack, we always spent Thanksgiving with my dad's family which was not a whole lot different than yesterday. We just sit around and eat and talk and nap and watch football, etc. Jack's family has an added tradition of looking through all the newspaper adds for the specials on Friday. We sort of did that here. But, we also did a puzzle - I was up until 2am last night finishing it. I LOVE PUZZLES!

4. The day after Thanksgiving is considered a major Christmas shopping day by most US retailers. Do you go out bargain hunting and shop ‘till you drop, or do you stay indoors with the blinds closed? Or something in between? I really don't like to shop, and so the thought of shopping on the same day as the rest of the United States kinda makes me shiver with fear, loathing and indignation. So, instead today, I'm going to participate (albeit alone) in "Buy Nothing Day."

5. Let the HOLIDAY SEASON commence! When will your Christmas decorations go up? I've done it on the day after Thanksgiving Day in the past, however, since we're here in Houston and I doubt the dogs and the dog sitter back at our house are going to be decorating, we will be waiting till sometime later during Advent to do all that. I kinda wish the tradition was still around where you don't decorate until Christmas Day. But, alas, the cultural tide, driven by our consumerist society has pushed the Christmas holidays back to mid September. We'll probably get a tree next weekend or something like that. I think our decorations will be rather slim this year.

Ok, I'm mad at blogger

2007-11-18T14:45:00.001-06:00

So, all this time, I thought I had posted every day, but I'm discovering as I look back through my blog history, that posts are not showing up every day! I was very confused, because I've been very contentious about it. Early in the month, I pre-wrote a few because I knew there would be those days that posting would be difficult. So, I would write them, and save them. Then, on the busy days (like yesterday OMG!!!) I would post them. Well, blogger didn't post them on that day! Blogger is predating them - posting them under the date that I wrote the blog. Well, all I have to say about that is "CRAP!"

Well... that's it

2007-11-18T14:26:00.000-06:00

This morning was the 5th and final Sunday of the project. Frankly, though, I don't feel like I've actually finished anything because there is still plenty to do. This morning went very well, though a little long. So, before the 11:00 service, we decided to cut a few things (middle hymn, some of the prayers of the people, etc.) because we had to end on time. At 12:00 we had a Thanks-Giving lunch to culminate the Stewardship Campaign, so we really couldn't go long. So, we cut stuff, but then Bryan did not arrive, so we had to sing part of the middle hymn afterall. Then, he didn't cut his sermon at 11, he actually went 2 min. longer. So, all the time we saved (well, the 4 1/2 min.) we lost so we were still 8 min. over. Oh well. I hate the fact that we have to time everything to the second. I don't know how to avoid it though, with the two services running concurrently. Someday, perhaps we'll figure out something different. I hope.

This morning was the final Sunday of our Stewardship campaign, and the day to bring our pledge cards for 2008. So, after the sermon, while Mary played Be Thou My Vision, people walked forward to put their cards in the baskets at the front. However, they were not just bringing pledge cards. During the sermon, Bryan instructed people to write thank you notes to God on strips of ribbon they were given as they walked in the sanctuary. Along with the offering and pledge cards, people brought the ribbons. Then, after each service, two of the team took the ribbons and attached them to a wreath with a big red fabric cross in the middle. It really turned out beautifully. I'll try to take a picture of it and post it sometime this week. The wreath was then on display as people left the luncheon and then will also be used in our Thanksgiving Eve service on Wednesday and on display next week. Anyway, the ladies who came up with the idea really made a beautiful piece of artwork. I'm very excited about it. It was a good, tangible, way for people to express their thanks individually, but also corporately as one Body, united in Christ.

This week is Thanksgiving week, and I am planning to take a break and enjoy the time with family and friends. I'll still blog each day for NaPoBloMo, but they will probably be short and sweet - place holders, shall we say. Then, when I return from my respite, the writing will begin in earnest.

2007-11-16T10:34:00.001-06:00

Songbird brings us today's Friday Five:

Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Philippians 4:8, NRSV)

Friends, it's nearly Thanksgiving in the U.S. and it's the time of year when we are pressed to name things for which we are thankful. I want to offer a twist on the usual lists and use Paul's letter to the church at Philippi as a model. Name five things that are true, honorable, just, pure, pleasing, commendable, excellent or worthy of praise. These could be people, organizations, acts, ideas, works of art, pieces of music--whatever comes to mind for you.

1. Well, you all know by now that I'm rather mushy when it comes to my husband, so I have to say that he is one of those things that are at the top of my list. He is certainly not perfect, but he is true, honorable, just, pure, pleasing, commendable, excellent and worthy of praise.

2. There is nothing so true and noble as a good dog, and we're blessed to be able to share our house with two. Trent and Meg. I think they're the best dogs in the world and few things make my heart smile quite like these two. Trent's mom was a shelty, but we're not sure what his dad was. Some have said perhaps German Shepherd, but Jack thinks he was a coyote. Sometimes, I think he's right, cause Trent is a crazy crazy dog. Meg, we're pretty sure is all border collie. We got her from a border collie rescuer. Apparently she was on the table at the pound, and they were about to put her down since no one had claimed her. But, then Meg looked at the technician with her big black eyes that will melt your heart and the tech couldn't go through with it. So, she called our friend who rescues border collies, and then we got her. She's the sweetest dog you'll ever meet!

3. Children's voices in worship. Periodically, we'll have the children sing in church, and even sometimes, they'll sing one part of a familiar hymn along with the congregation. And, let me tell you, there is nothing in the world like hearing 50 young voices singing Give Thanks at the top of their lungs! Or, even better, at Christmastime, they always sing the first part of the refrain to O Come All Ye Faithful by themselves, and that's enough to send me straight to heaven!

4. Making music together, whether it's just me and one other person, or in a group of thousands. The sound of voices and instruments all working together to create beauty is such a blessing from God. Last weekend, we had a concert where we performed Randall Thompson's Testament of Freedom. It's not one of my favorite works, but it was quite an experience when it all came together. On top of that, my mom was at the organ with me. We do this from time to time. A couple of years ago, we played the Durfle Requiem (now that IS one of my favorite pieces of music ever!) together as a duet. When we play togehter, we can get so much more of the orchestration and play so many more colors on the organ, than if we played it alone. And, it's really a joy to collaborate on stuff like that with my mom. She's pretty special!

5. There are too many things that fit this description to only name 5. God created all of them. So for number 5 I'm going to have to go with God.

Criticism - I suck at taking it

2007-11-15T21:34:00.000-06:00

Over the past few weeks, I've been asking members of our congregation to fill out questionnaires regarding the worship services. I was very careful to ask pointed questions to get very specific answers. I wanted to know, very specifically:

#1 Did you participate in worship

#2 Were the elements in the worship service helpful or hurtful to your participation.

What i didn't want to know was "I don't like this, or I don't like that." However, I found there were two kind of answerers:

#1 People who are filling out the questionnaires because I've asked them to and they want me to get a good grade on my paper

#2 People who don't like much of what we're doing ("Why can't we do it like we used to when Mike [previous pastor] was here [over 10 years ago]?") and so take the opportunity to write down how much they don't like certain things that we have planned.

So, I read these questionnaires and about 80% of them check all the nice answers, circle the highest number possible, and just generally say 'yes' to all the open ended questions, with a couple of really nice responses ("I just love the music!") And then about 20% of them are rather negative: "Bongos belong in a bar, not a church," "Worship should be quite and reverent - not loud and boisterous," "Why do we have to change the words to the Apostle's Creed," "I'm Presbyterian, and we don't have to show off our faith, my faith is quite and only for me." etc.

All I hear are these negative responses and they're just ringing in my ears and I take it all personally. I know that I cannot take them personally, because the changes and things that we've made to our worship over the past 3 years have not just been my choice - they've been made after serious deliberation among many people, and many people support these changes. Certainly there have been some elements that the Worship Planning Team planned for these 5 Sundays that in hindsight didn't work as well as we thought they might, and in the future we'd do something different, but they were decided on by the team and not me. So, why do I feel as if every negative comment is directly pointed at me? why do I feel it in the bottom of my gut as if someone were telling me that the way I wear my hear is rather ugly and prevents them from worshiping?

Oh, this is so hard for me. Why am I so fragile?

Between Times

2007-11-14T09:17:00.001-06:00

In our church, the Contemporary Service and one of the Traditional services (oh how I hate those labels) run at the same time. So, Bryan preaches early at the Contemporary service and then leaves to come to the Traditional service to preach. I think it's a phenomenon common to many churches. I'm not crazy about the arrangement, but that's a discussion for another time. This video was made for our Contemporary Service as a joke to show what Bryan does when he leaves that service. I think it's absolutely hilarious! Enjoy:

Sunday the Fourth

2007-11-13T08:28:00.001-06:00

Which was actually the 11th. The 4th was the third :). This past Sunday was the 4th of the 5 and as I wrote on Sunday morning, we didn't do too much to this service. In fact, I had a hard time deciding what to include in the questionnaire for this week because there wasn't a whole lot to ask about. We did do the Apostle's Creed in Q/A format, so I asked about that, and the Call to Worship was a rather boisterous affair, but other than that it was a rather calm, and quite beautiful Sunday morning. I was quite pleased with how everything came together and such a nice respite after 3 weeks of a certain level of chaos. Now, the chaos (and I don't mean that in a bad way at all) of the previous 3 weeks had as much to do with the time of year and happenings in the church as with what the team planned for worship services. They would have been somewhat chaotic anyway, with Reformation Sunday, All Saints Sunday, coming back into the Sanctuary after having been out for 4 months, Sanctuary Dedication, baptisms right and left, etc. etc.

Here's a rundown of this past Sunday's service:

Prelude - my mom was in town so she played an improv on Let All Things Now Living (Ash Grove)
Gathering Song - same one we've been doing - with somewhat mixed reaction
Welcome/Announcements
Call to Worship - for this call to worship, Kerry, the DOM led the congregation. Using part of the text from the opening hymn, the congregation stood facing each other (north side faced the south side) and we said (some of us yelled!) Alleluia back and forth to each other and finished with Praise the Everlasting King. It actually worked pretty well
Hymn: Praise My Soul the King of Heaven
Prayer of Confession
Assurance of Forgiveness
Response of Praise - normally we've been singing Give Thanks at this point, but this week we sang one verse of Be Thou My Vision (Riches I head not...)
Apostle's Creed - in Q/A format
Anthem - Jesus Paid It All (The title makes it sound like a bad choice for a Stewardship Sunday, but the next line after that is "All to Him I owe" so it works great)
Prayers of the People/Lord's Prayer - the liturgist at 8:15 and at 11:00 included a veterans remembrance in their prayer)
Offertory - I sang, with my mom at the piano and one of our members on guitar and singing as well - Turn Turn Turn (Pete Seeger).
Doxology
Prayer of Thanksgiving
Baptism - two this morning - the cutest babies you can ever imagine! (I think that clock in my head is getting rather loud)
Children's Message (11:00 only)
Prayer for Illumination
Scripture: Luke 12:15-21
Sermon: It All Goes Back in the Box - it was a good sermon, and one that I needed to hear. Certainly not a 'feel good' sermon.
Closing Hymn: Be Thou My Vision - not the 3 verse version in the Presbyterian Hymnal, but the 4 verse version found in most other hymnals
Benediction
Postlude: Praise My Soul the King of Heaven (can't remember the composer right now)

It was a nice, calm, Spirit filled morning - which I certainly needed because the rest of the day was rather crazy. But, that day is finally past. The concert went really well but way way way too long. I actually made it through everything without falling off the organ bench. Seriously that was a concern :). The Ives didn't go as smoothly as I would have liked, but the Testament of Freedom went great! As did the 12-tone organ duet my mom and I played. I gave a brief theory lesson to the congregation so that they would know why it sounded like we were playing all wrong notes. So, onward and upward

Congratulations are due

2007-11-12T07:51:00.001-06:00

Two of my classmates have finished the long race. Val and Jim are now Dr. Val and Dr. Jim. Congratulations my brothers. The journey with you has been rich and rewarding. Thank you for your love and support. I will not soon forget our time together and hope it doesn't end here.

2007-11-11T05:40:00.000-06:00

Today will be the 4th of the 5 Sundays, and frankly, we didn't do too much to this service. I don't remember it being so normal when we planned it. Normal isn't such a bad thing and since the last 3 Sundays have been rather far flung because of all the different seasonal things we were dealing with, it might be nice to have a quite Sunday. At least for me. I won't be running around with my head cut off this morning. Nope, I'm saving that for this afternoon.

As I look through the questionnaires for these services (and surprisingly I've gotten quite a few back), I'm beginning to wonder how much information I really will get from them. Participation is a tricky thing, you know. Many of the questionnaires indicate that the person participated as fully as is humanly possible and everything in the service helped them to that end. I'm a little inclined to believe that they are just trying to be enthusiastic for my sake and that they're not taking the time to really think about what it means to participate in worship. Then, there are those (few in number but loud and clear) that indicate that they don't care for much of what was planned and "why can't worship be like it used to be when Mike (former minister) was here?". With these people (who also have said things like "that song belongs around a campfire, not in a church"), I wonder if there is anything that could be said or done to get them to possibly look at something from a different angle. They are very decidedly set in their ways and want things a certain way, the rest of the world be damned. A friend warned me about these questionnaires, that they have a tendency to be answered by two extremes of people - those who really liked the service and those who didn't like much at all. The problem is that I don't really care about whether or not someone liked it or not, I just want to know if they participated and what helped/hindered them in their participation. But, if we're not all on the same page as to what participation means, then what's the point anyway?

These are all things I'm sure will be dealt with in chapter 4 and I'm glad that I'll have other stuff with which to measure the project. Oh, it's gonna be a long few months....

Friday Five: Extravagant Unbusyness

2007-11-09T07:43:00.000-06:00

Sally brings us this weeks Friday Five:

I am writing in my official capacity of grump!!! No seriously, with the shops and stores around us filling with Christmas gifts and decorations, the holiday season moving up on us quickly for many the time from Thanksgiving onwards will be spent in a headlong rush towards Christmas with hardly a time to breathe.... I am looking at the possibility of finding little gaps in the day or the week to spend in extravagant unbusyness ( a wonderful phrase coined by a fellow revgal...

So given those little gaps, name 5 things you would do to;

1. to care for your body - There are so many things I could do differently to care for my body because I apparently don't take care of my body enough. So, here are a few things - get 8 actual hours of sleep each night; eat less fast food; regular massages with my fabulous massage therapist, Karen; attend Karen's Qi Gong class; use more moisturizer.

2. to care for your spirit - observe sabbath rest. I just don't know how to do it and still get everything done. I tried it last week, and on Sunday morning, I was a mess because there were a number of hanging details that plagued me all through the services. Ugh. I told my pastor about my experience trying to take a sabbath (it was his insistence that I take one) and he kinda laughed at me and asked how I feel when I go to the gym for the first time in a long time. Kinda hurts, doesn't it? Well, same thing here, it takes some getting used to.

3. to care for your mind - Oh, my mind already gets lots of attention. I think too much already which is why the rest of me gets neglected. So, perhaps to take care of my mind, I should turn it off periodically.

4. to bring a sparkle to your eye - spend all day in bed with my husband. Really, spending any time, any where with my husband brings a sparkle to my eye :). Just thinking about him right now is causing me to grin like a silly little girl. Ok, you can stop gagging now. I'll stop, I promise.

5. to place a spring in your step - more dancing! I can always use more dancing in my life. Nothing, other than my husband, puts me in a cheerful mood more than dancing. Hmmm... dancing WITH my husband, now that would just put me immediately on cloud nine. Expect we can't do that in our house because our dog, Trent, is Baptist. The moment either one of us starts to dance, alone or with each other, he goes ballistic! I have no idea why he does this. The only explanation we can come up with is that he is Baptist. Our other dog, Meg, could care less if we dance, as long as we pet her.

Enjoy the time to indulge and dream.... and then for a bonus which one on the list are you determined to put into action? I'm determined to figure out how to observe Sabbath each week. But, it will have to wait until next week... no time right now. I'm off to practice with my mother for our concert on Sunday.

Ahhh... procrastination

2007-11-09T00:20:00.001-06:00

Your Inner European is Italian!

Passionate and colorful.
You show the world what culture really is.

Who's Your Inner European?

Facinating video

2007-11-08T08:16:00.000-06:00

Tripp, over at conjectural navel gazing, posted this video on his blog yesterday (thanks, Tripp). I found it to be very interesting and it will probably find its way in some form into my paper. I'd love to hear your thoughts on how this talk relates to worship - particularly participation and non participation in worship.

Enjoy...

Ten, Twenty, Thirty Meme

2007-11-06T22:56:00.000-06:00

Oooh! It's my first time to be tagged for a meme. Thanks Sally! I hope I do it right. I was going to add pictures, but alas I don't have any pictures on this computer before 2001, and don't have time to find old ones and scan them. So, sans pics, here goes:

1997: I was living in Urban, Illinois. My sister and I moved there in 1996 after I finished by BM from TCU. Sallie was working on her MM from UofI in Piano, and I was going to begin working on my MM in Vocal Performance. But as it turned out, I needed some time off. So... I ballroom danced for 2 years! It was quite awesome. I really got into it, competing and even beginning to teach. The summer of 97 I traveled with a group of singers from UofI to sing in a tiny opera house in Humbach, Germany (about an hour train ride south of Munich). Try to find that town on the map. I dare you :). But, there was, believe it or not, an opera house in a barn there, and it was filled every night. And all the men were wearing their Lederhosen. It certainly was an interesting summer. That time in Illinois with my sis was rather cozy. I was also working as a nanny for a great family - 3 kids. The two younger ones (twins) I think are close to college now, and that really freaks me out.

1987: My family lived in Ft. Worth in the Berkley neighborhood. I was a freshman at Paschal High School and little did I know that one of my classmates, Jack, would be my husband one day. I would have laughed really hard if you had told me that little fact back then. He was a band geek, and I was, well just a geek. That fall I was in the school play, Voices From the High School, and had to kiss a boy on stage. It was my first stage kiss AND my first kiss period. I was so freaked out! And, again, who knew that the boy I had to kiss would one day design my wedding invitation!

1977: My parents were in school at the University of Illinois in Urbana for the 3rd time. My mom, I think was teaching at this point and my dad was working on his DMA in choral conducting. I was 4 years old, had an older brother and sister. My little sis wasn't even a twinkle in my parents eyes. That was a charmed time for our family. Really, the only good word to describe Urbana is cozy :).

Ok, now I tag: Lisa, Jayare, and Leah Sophia.

Funny Cartoon

2007-11-06T07:06:00.001-06:00

I saw this cartoon on Sally's blog and just had to post it here as it is basically a perfect snapshot of me trying to work...

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Oh yeah, $100 bills

2007-11-04T22:31:00.001-06:00

Yesterday I included in my post subject line "$100 bills," and then forgot to mention them. Sorry 'bout that. The scripture on Sunday was Matthew 25:14-29, the parable about the master who gives talents to his 3 servants and then goes away. When he comes back, two of them have doubled what the master left and one has just buried it in the ground. To illustrate that passage, Bryan invited volunteers to come up to the front to go on an 'adventure' with God. 3 for the 8:15 service, 5 for the 9:30 and 11:00 services, and I'm going to guess 3 at the 10:45 service and at 11:00 4 of them were under the age of 12. Anyway, these people had no idea what they were volunteering for. Bryan handed each of them a $100 bill and told them that this money was not theirs to spend any old which way. But, it was God's money with which they should go out and do God's work. They each have 3 months to turn those $100s into something good, something that God is calling each of them to do. One of the volunteers told me that after the 9:30 service, someone walked up to her and handed her a check for $100 to add to her money! Wow! So, in 3 months we'll hear back from these 16 people to see what they did with the $1600. I can't wait.

What a cool idea!

Oh, and the money was given by one person in the congregation. Bryan had shared the idea with the man and he pulled out his checkbook right then an there. I'd love to be that wealthy to do that sort of thing. Then, again, I've seen what else wealth can do to people and I'm not sure I want that much temptation...

Candles, Communion, $100 bills, Super Long Worship services

2007-11-04T22:12:00.000-06:00

Yesterday's service was really good and really frustrating all at the same time. All 3 services ran late - I'm not talking 5 min. late. I'm talking 25 min. late!!! For some people, an hour and 25 min service is kinda short, or par for the course. And, I've been to many services that long, and didn't mind the length at all. Frankly, I've been to some 45 min. services that seemed to last an eternity. Anyway, the problem with services running 25 minutes over at our church is the Sunday School and Child Care people then are stuck with their kids 25 minutes after they've completed their lessons and are left hanging. That's really not a good thing. So, here's why it was so long:

1. Communion Sunday - since we don't do it every week (which I think we should!) we have to calculate into the hour, at least 15 min. for communion, which means something else needs to be cut

2. All Saints Sunday - we took about 2 1/2 minutes to read the names of those who had passed away in the last year, 39 in all.

3. 3rd graders got their bibles at the 11:00 service. Bad Sunday to schedule that on, but it was put on a long time ago and anyway, it couldn't be changed.

4. The offertory took a little longer because it was a Youth Choir anthem and it took them a little while to get into place before we could start singing.

5. Stewardship speaker - was supposed to be 3 to 5 minutes but was actually 7 mins.

6. Sermon - 25 mins plus 3 mins for a longish Scripture text.

7. We actually cut a lot out of the service - the only hymns were the opening hymn (only 3 verses at that) and the Lord's Prayer sung at the end. No middle hymn, no closing hymn. We didn't have a Prayers of the People because supposedly it's 'covered' in the Communion Prayers (though it rarely is, those communion prayers get shorter and shorter every time).

Add that all up and you get an hour and 25 min. service.

Timing aside, it was a beautiful service. Some things didn't happen the way they should have, but that happens every week. For All Saints observance, we read the names of the people who had passed. Then, the choir sang For All The Saints (Vaughan Williams - though the bulletin read Vashaun Williams) while a candle lighter lit 38 candles that were on a table at the front. Then, during communion, as people were walking back to their seats they were invited to participate in the candle lighting by lighting candles themselves in memory of and thanksgiving for anyone in their lives that had passed. We had some extra tables with candles down front and to the sides and all along the window sills all the way to the back. Let me tell you that working out those logistics was a BIG. PAIN. IN. MY. REAR. But, all worth it. I had some help from a few guys on the team we dubbed "the pyro crew" so I wasn't all alone in the process.

So, 3 down, 2 to go.

I do plan to post every day this week (well, every day this month, really) but some of my posts this week may be rather short and sweet. Next Sunday is our fall concert and I'll be locked in the sanctuary most of the week getting ready for that. On top of that, Mom, Dad and my lil' sis are coming into town this weekend, so at some point, I've got to whip the house into shape... Oh, I need a clone right about now... no, wait, that's a scary thought.

Sunday morning prayer

2007-11-03T22:52:00.001-05:00

Heavenly Father,
give me the words to say what needs to be said. You are Lord of all, of all those places in my heart that I try to hide from you. Help me to give those places back to you - the rightful owner. Take this thesis from me Lord and do with it what is your will. I cannot go it alone.

be present in our worship this morning, for we are seeking you. "Sir, we wish to see Jesus." That is still true today. Lord, we wish to see you, to worship you, to love you. Because you first loved us. All of us.

Lord, we wish to see Jesus.

Amen.

Friday Five: Interviews

2007-11-02T08:41:00.000-05:00

Mother Laura brings us this weeks Friday Five about Interviews:

Songbird just had an interview for a "vague and interesting" possibility, and More Cows than People is doing campus visits for doctoral programs. There always seem to be a few RevGals applying for new positions, and I just got my first call for this year's preliminary interviews for college teaching jobs at the American Academy of Religion meeting in San Diego coming up in a few weeks. It's for my dream job among this year's offerings, and I am flipflopping between excitement and nervousness. So please keep your fingers crossed and say a little prayer for everyone facing such conversations, and share your thoughts on the wonderful world of interviews:

1. What was the most memorable interview you ever had? The only interview I can really think of right now was for the job I currently hold. It was a rather lengthy process with lots of different sections. The great thing about this interview is they allowed my husband to be a part of it. I was a little afraid it might come across as bringing my mommy along with me, but in actuality it allowed the search committee to see that Jack and I work as a team and that if you hire me, you're getting two people in the bargain. The whole thing was a two day process. They flew us both in (I was coming from NY and Jack was coming from Texas, we were not married yet, just engaged) and put us up in a hotel (separate rooms, of course). We had lunch with the committee, then had a speaking interview. Then, I played organ and piano for them, including hymn sight-reading. Then, they wanted to see me in action directing a children's choir so they put together a small group of kids and I worked on a piece of music with them. There was a party with the choir and the session, and finally a talk with the personnel team about money and such. Overall it was a fun experience. I really appreciated being able to have my husband there. He was really good and helping me remember names and knowing whom to ask what questions, etc. I do have a funny anecdote from that interview. I was asked if I know how to improvise and I said that I want to learn how to be better than I am at it, but that I do know how to noodle when needed. The committee laughed so hard and I couldn't figure out what they were laughing about. Apparently, my definition of noodling (playing around on the organ to get from one key to the next, or to just fill dead air) is different than the Oklahoma definition, which is catfish fishing where you reach down into the mud and grab the catfish and pull them out - apparently a rather dangerous activity.

2. Have you ever been the interviewer rather than the interviewee? If so, are you a tiger, a creampuff, or somewhere in between? Come to think about it, I don't think I ever have. Hmmmm. But knowing me, I'd probably be a creampuff.

3. Do phone interviews make you more or less nervous than in-person ones? Less, I think, because I can stand and walk around, or even dance if I want to, and they don't know over the phone. But in person, your body is on the spot as well as your voice.

4. What was the best advice you ever got to prepare for an interview? How about the worst? Honestly, the only advice I can think of that I got for an interview was "say your name clearly." I really can't think of any other advice than that. That was more for an audition, really.

5. Do you have any pre-interview rituals that give you confidence? Take a deep breath and remember that what is supposed to happen, will.

Sabbath thought

2007-11-01T08:32:00.000-05:00

My pastor shared this thought with me the other day. We were talking about how I'm headed straight to burnout and if I don't take sabbath rest now, I won't make it through this Thesis. And I was arguing with him that I understand intellectually what he is saying, and know that it is true, but that doesn't make it any more possible to do. Then he said this:

Life is based in 7 day cycles - the Bible begins with a 7 day cycle. God rested within that framework of 7 days. If we don't take sabbath rest within each 7 day cycle then we are basically saying that we are better than God. How eternally arrogant that is to say that I am better than God, that I don't need to rest. God did, but I'm better than that. Well, if that's not sin, I don't know what is.

Day 1 - Wish Me Luck

2007-11-01T07:36:00.001-05:00

So, today is the first day of November which also means it's the first day of NaBloPoMo, or National Blog Posting Month, and I have agreed to write EVERY DAY. We'll see if I can pull it off.

To start, I'll give a brief recap of where I am at this point in the thesis process. The Worship Planning Team came together back in August and had 6 weeks of study and worship together. That part went amazingly well. It's hard to believe that I'm on this side of things. After those 6 weeks, we met again for 2 weekend 'retreats' and one extra Tuesday morning to play the 5 worship services of the Stewardship Campaign: Oct. 21st through Nov. 18th. As you can see by the date, we've made it through 2 of the 5 Sundays. I have yet to have any negative responses, which isn't necessarily a good thing. I've created (well, and am creating as we go along) questionnaires for people to fill out after each service with directed questions about the service. I was careful to ask questions that do not ask "Did you like it?" but ask "Did you participate" and "What in the service helped or hindered that participation?" After the 5 Sundays, I'll meet with a few people for one on one interviews in addition to these questionnaires. Then, I'll have the very difficult task of evaluating all this data.

For this week, I still have some details to iron out, but we're close to ready to go. On Sunday, I'll post an overview of the service. I think I'm also going to try to post PDFs of each of the bulletins. I'm not sure how to do that, but I'll try.

I am hoping to get a lot of writing done this month on Chapter 2 specifically (Biblical, Theological and Historical Foundation for the project). However, the next week and a half is pretty much a loss because on the 11th we have our fall choir concert (which has a Veteran's Day focus) and once again, I've agreed to do too much! I have 1 week to learn (or get back into my fingers) and register on the organ the following:

1. Randall Thompson's Testament of Freedom (my mom and I are playing the orchestra part as an organ duet)
2. Charles Ives' Variations on America (this has a KILLER pedal part in the final movement)
3. An organ duet titled Variations on Yankee Doodle Visits New York City (again, my mom and I, and I can't remember the composer right now)
4. Highland Cathedral with flute, percussion, organ and lots of bagpipes (I can really play the plain old version of this piece in my sleep which is what we played last Sunday. But this version is a 9 minute version that I transcribed off an old recording that requires a lot of registration and nimble fingers)

Each of these pieces are a blast to play in their own way, but a lot of work must be done before now and the 11th. Which means I have to sacrifice my study time tomorrow and next Friday. However, especially since I won't have my Friday study day for 2 weeks I'll be focused especially strong on getting in at least 1 hour every day.

If you're in the Oklahoma City area, I invite you to come to our concert on November 11th at 5:00 pm. It will be a fantastic concert with lots of variety, featuring our Chancel Choir, our Agape Seekers Youth Choir, the Westminster Pipe Band (these guys win national competitions and the director is a member of our church), My mom and I on the organ and the OU Brass Quintet. It's a free concert. If you need more information, you can visit the church website: Westminster Presbyterian Church.

See you tomorrow...

2 Sundays down 3 to go

2007-10-28T22:20:00.000-05:00

So, this morning as the 2nd of the 5 Sundays. I was going to post last week with a report but just never got around to it. I guess I need to start getting better at regular posting very soon if I'm going to actually post every day in November.

So, first for last week. The service went very well, with positive feedback from a number of people. Here's an outline of the service:

Prelude - Be Thou My Vision arr. Albert Travis
Gathering Song - Gloria Peru
Welcome/Announcements and Passing of the Peace
Call to Worship and Opening Hymn
This was Be Thou My Vision with a responsive reading based on Psalm 24 weaved in between the verses. i.e. we spoke a few lines, sang a verse, said a few more lines, sang a verse, etc.
Prayer of Confession
Assurance of Forgiveness
Response of Praise - Give Thanks
Nicene Creed
Scripture (which we read all together in unison) Jeremiah 29:11-12
Anthem: "The Plans I Have for You" by (shoot, I can't remember right now)
Prayers of the People/Lord's Prayer sung by the congregation
Offertory statement
Offering: Give Thanks arr. Jan Sanborn
Doxology
Prayer of Thanksgiving
Children's Message
Hymn - This Is My Father's World
Stewardship statement
Prayer for Illumination
Scripture - again, read in unison by the congregation: Psalm 24:1-2
Sermon: "At the Heart of our Faith"
Hymn: O Lord, You Are My God and King
Benediction
Postlude: Carillon by Herbert Murrill

So - a couple of notes about this service. First, let me start out by saying that it would be my preference to have the offertory, prayers of the people and confessional statement after the sermon as a response to the Word. However, because the minister preaches at the 10:45 Contemporary service and the 3rd Traditional service starts at 11:00 he comes in late to that service and we can't get to the sermon any earlier than 30 min. into the service. which means we have to front load the whole service. I really don't like it and I keep fighting for us to come up with a better solution, but so far, no luck.
Back to the service - the Gloria Peru gathering song at the beginning is new. it's a really fun responsive song from Peru. We decided we wanted something at the very beginning of the service that really got people focused and together before we get started. Usually, noone listens to the prelude and it takes a little while for people to settle down and come together. So, this little, easy to sing, fun song helps to draw everyone together and focus on worship. I was a little nervous about people joining in, but they really did and many people reacted positively to it. We're doing it all 5 weeks, so they should know it well by then.

The Call to Worship/Hymn thing also worked well. On thing was that the choir processed as usual, but stopped at the end of each verse for the speaking parts which meant they were in the midst of the congregation longer which is a great thing. It also seemed to really set off the words of each verse of the song and the text of Psalm 24 dovetailed nicely with the hymn.

Since the scripture readings were short this day, they lent themselves well to being read in unison. And the fact that we read together the Jeremiah text before the anthem, and the anthem was the same text, I think helped people to listen to the anthem with more intentionality as opposed to just turning off their brains and hearing the pretty music.

Today's worship service, was quite different. There were many factors that played a part. It is Reformation Sunday, and this year a group of ladies made new Confessional Banners (9 in all) as the old ones were over 20 years old and looking like it. It was also our Sanctuary Dedication Sunday since we just recently renovated it - new paint, new floor, pews refinished, choir loft reoriented from a split chancel (men on one side, women on the other, facing each other) to the choir in a semi circle facing the congregation and the Table in front of the choir, and lots of other changes. Also, the minster didn't preach at the Contemporary service so we could put the offering and stuff wherever we wanted :). So, here's what happened this morning:

Prelude: Be Thou My Vision arr. Mary K. Sallee
Gathering Song: Gloria Peru
Call to Worship from the back of the sanctuary: The Elder for that service knocked on the door and said: "Open to me the gates of righteousness, and I will go in and worship the Lord." The the head Deacon for the service opened the door and the Elder walked in and said "Peace be to this house and to all who worship here. Peace be to those that enter and to those that go out. Peace be to those that love it and love the names of Jesus Christ our Lord. Let us Worship God"
Processional Hymn: God is Here! - this procession included the Christ Candle 9 banners, the Elder, the Liturgist, the Chancel Choir and the Children's Choirs. LOTS OF PEOPLE!
Prayer of Confession
Assurance of Forgiveness
Response of Praise: Give Thanks
Anthem: Come Christians Join to Sing - with the Chancel Choir, the Children's Choirs, organ and trumpet.
Children's Message
Stewardship Statement - the speaker this morning did a fantastic job. So much so, she got applause at the 11:00 service! She really spoke from the heart, and gave a beautiful testimony.
Prayer of Illumination
Scripture Reading: Romans 1:1-17
Sermon: "This Very Place" (wow! what a sermon it was)
Affirmation of Faith using an excerpt from the Barmen Declaration
Sanctuary Dedication - we recognized the people who gave of their time and resources to make it all happen, including the banner ladies, and then had a responsive prayer of dedication.
Offering
Offertory - Highland Cathedral with organ, piano, timpani, orchestral chimes and 3 bagpipers. It brought the house down!
Doxology
Prayer of Thanksgiving

Hymn: A Mighty Fortress is Our God
Benediction
Postlude - Bagpipers.

So - 2 down, 3 to go. And lots more work before it's all over. Starting Thursday, you can expect a post every day from me!

NaBloPoMo

2007-10-19T23:57:00.000-05:00

November is National Blog Posting Month and I have decided to take on the challenge of posting every day for a month. When you are finally able to stop laughing... I'll go on... :)

No, seriously, I'm really going to try this. Here's my reasoning. Beginning now, I've got to start putting pen to paper (or finger to keyboard, really) and writing this thesis. I'm almost through with the project portion, and now the fun begins of actually writing the paper. I say "fun" with a hefty dose of sarcasm. Writing is really not that easy for me, as you've probably already noticed. However, it just has to be done. So, I figure if I take this challenge, then I'll have to write something every day and I can just post here what I write. Honestly, it will probably be VERY boring for you to read. And some days it may be just one sentence. But, I am determined to get this done!

The project has been immensely satisfying, surprising, bless-ful, and better than I ever imagined. Sunday morning is the first of the 5 planned Sundays. I'm more than a little nervous about it, but everyone keeps reassuring me that it will be just fine.

So, now the writing begins. I'm gonna post every day of November. it's not quite November just yet, so I have a little more time to try and talk myself out of it. Wish me luck :)

Jack's Roast Chicken and Potatoes

2007-10-19T10:08:00.001-05:00

It seems that my description of my husband's roast chicken made everyone hungry. So, I asked him to dictate the recipe to me. He wants me to tell you at the start that he is not a very scientific cook, he does most things by feel. And he rarely writes things down. So, you won't find to many exact measurements in this recipe. I was also surprised to discover that he doesn't preheat the oven. I double checked that with him and he said you can if you want, but he usually doesn't for this dish. So, feel free to modify however you want. Yummm... I'm hungry.

1. Take 1 whole chicken, remove innards, cover the chicken in salt water and brine overnight.

2. Remove chicken from salt water and pat skin dry. Let the chicken air dry for 30 min.

3. Stuff inside chicken roughly 2 to 3 garlic cloves, crushed rosemary, 1 onion quartered.

4. Drizzle over chicken 3 tablespoons of olive oil and smear on more crushed rosemary and kosher salt.

5. Cube (about half inch squares) 3 to 4 potatoes (your choice on kind of potato) and 2 sweet potatoes and place in a large cookie sheet. Drizzle half a cup of olive oil. Sprinkle rosemary, half a clove of finely chopped garlic, and a whole coarsely chopped onion, salt and pepper to taste.

6. Place cookie sheet on bottom rack of oven and the chicken directly on the rack above the cookie sheet and set the oven at 370. Cook until chicken is done - approx. 1 hour for a medium size chicken.

Friday Five: Homage to the Top Chef!

2007-10-18T22:34:00.000-05:00

Today's Friday Five (on Thursday night) is brought to us by RevHRod at You Don't Have to Listen, I Just Like to Talk.

This Fall my family has been energetically watching Top Chef on the Bravo channel. My teenage daughter watches with the dream of some day being a chef. My husband watches because he loves reality shows and I mean, really loves them. Plus the whole competition thing really works for him. Me, I love cooking and good food. Every so often I get an idea from this group of talented young chefs who are competing for big money and honors galore.

The winner for this season was Hung. Not the fan favorite, but he won fair and square. In his bio, he says if he were a food "I would be spicy chili - it takes a while to get used to, but once you eat it you always come back for more!" With that in mind, here is this week’s Friday Five.

If you were a food, what would you be? Ice Cream - but a kind that would be the real honest to goodness ice cream, but miraculously fat and sugar free. I like to make people happy and that seems to me to be the best way!

What is one of the most memorable meals you ever had? And where? Many come to mind for various reasons, ranging from the fabulous to the ridiculous, but the first one I thought of was a meal Jack and I had on our honeymoon. We went to Disneyworld cause we're silly like that. They have this incredible restaurant in the Safari resort. The cuisine was not really "African" per se; it would be rather difficult to encompass an entire continent and countless different languages and groups of people in one menu. But, the food was quite incredible. I can't even remember what it was we ate, I just know it was incredible. What I do remember was the wine. We had a bottle of Culrathian (I think that's the name) Serah. Wow! What a wine. It's a South African wine and we can't find it anywhere. The other thing that made that meal fabulous was the fact that it was with my husband. There's nothing quite so wonderful as a meal with my sweetheart. :) (you can stop gagging now.)

What is your favorite comfort food from childhood? My grandmother's fried okra. I was THE. PICKIEST. EATER. EVER! as a kid. I wouldn't eat anything for fear I would choke and die. But, I would eat okra. Yeah, I know, I'm a freak. I still don't like milk on my cereal and am still a little afraid that anything from the sea might choke me.

When going to a church potluck, what one recipe from your kitchen is sure to be a hit? I don't cook. there's nothing I could possibly bring that would be a hit. Now, my dear sweet husband, on the other hand could make any number of things and they would be a hit. My favorite is his baked chicken that we brines overnight, then stuffs with garlic cloves and other fun stuff. Then, he sets it directly on one rack in the oven and puts a cookie sheet underneath filled with cubes of potatoes (sweet and regular), onions and more garlic cloves. YUMMY!

What’s the strangest thing you ever willingly ate? Seriously? Not a thing! Nope, things that I have not tried before have the potential to choke me. This stems (I believe) from when I was an infant and everything I would eat other than breast milk would make me swell up. My poor mom had to breast feed me till I was well past 2 until I outgrew the allergies. I'm sure that's where this irrational fear of food comes from. I'm 34 now, I'm afraid it's not really going away too soon.

Bonus question: What’s your favorite drink to order when looking forward to a great meal? when I'm really thirsty and hungry - Dr. Pepper. But, for a great meal, like with courses and yummy steak and dessert and a high bill at the end... A glass of really good red wine - not too dry, but not sweet, with a hint of pepper.

Game time

2007-10-15T22:03:00.000-05:00

Tripp over at Conjectural Navel Gazing played this game, and it sounds like fun. So, I'm playing too.

I promise to send a physical, tangible gift to the first 5 people who post on my blog and promise to do the same on their own blogs.

Let's spread some joy!

I'm so neglectful

2007-10-14T20:38:00.001-05:00

Please forgive my recent blog neglect. Life's just been a little bit busy. After the team's first planning retreat at the end of September, I took a thesis break for a couple of weeks as I prepared for and then went on a short mini-tour with the family. We did a show in Duncanville and Midland (both in Texas). Then, I came back and have just been so totally focused on our first Sunday back in the church, that I took another week of unintentional thesis break. We've been out of our sanctuary since June as it was in dire need of renovation. This morning was our first Sunday back, and boy have I missed the organ. It was a glorious Sunday indeed, with lots of music and lots of oohing and ahhing over the new paint, floor, refinished pews, reoriented chancel, etc.

As for the thesis - here's where it stands:

We've had our 6 weeks of study and training, as well as our 2 weekend planning retreats. Everything has been really successful. The people in this group have surprised me at every turn and watching them get so excited about planning a worship service is inspiring to say the least. The 5 services are planned with a few extra details to take care of. They still have to pass approval from the Senior Pastor and I imagine there will be things he'll nix. I hope not too much, though. The 5 Sundays begin this next week, and so if he's going to change anything, it better happen tomorrow. Once we get bulletins put together, I'll post them on my google page and link them here so you can see what our plans are.

I spent some time going over the first two services with the pastor this last week and he asked me if I thought the group had planned anything that was really 'out there' or had taken some big risks. And, I said that i didn't think they had at all. It seems to me what they have planned is not a whole lot of innovation. Rather, they've taken what we usually do and enhanced the level of congregational participation. For example, the calls to worship are more involved than just the minister saying a couple of words; there is a lot more unison scripture reading; on All Saints day, in addition to coming forward for communion, people will have an opportunity to light a candle for a loved one who has died; the bulletins for the 5 weeks are coordinated and include more art work in an effort to draw attention to themes and phrases that people should be watching for; a children's bulletin will be designed to pull the children into the action of the service; etc. There's nothing too radical for this congregation - just more focused on their participation. Which is exactly. what. i. had. hoped. for!!! :).

I didn't want them to innovate just for the sake of innovation. But, they have been incredibly creative. Another great little bonus is they all have commented on how they had no idea that putting together a worship service was so much work! I told them that really it can be as little or as much as you want to put into it.

So, now, the Sundays will happen, then we'll evaluate and I'll be a writing fiend for the next 4 months. Oh, and I don't have a choice about my deadline now. I have to turn in my paper on March 1st because I'M GOING ON THE REVGALBLOGPALS CRUISE!!! March 27th, baby! I'm so excited to meet so many of these wonderful ladies. But, by plunking down my deposit, I absolutely have to be done by then. I'll turn in the final draft (approved by my adviser) to the thesis director on the 1st and then have until the 27th to make revisions. I'm not sure how long I have after that to do the formating. I just want to have that call from Dr. B before I leave on the 27th that says, "Congratulations Dr. Stewart, you're approved."

Ok, no more neglect from me, I promise. And no more 'thesis breaks.'

Friday Five: Reverendmother's Swan Song

2007-09-27T22:46:00.000-05:00

This week's Friday Five is brought to us by Reverendmother who is about to have a baby. I'm at that age where there seem to be new babies everywhere. I even had a dream last night that I was pregnant (Mom, don't get hopeful. I'm not and not going to be any time soon!). Anyway, Reverendmother writes:

Well friends, as I prepare for the birth of Bonus Baby, it's time to simplify life, step back from the Friday Five, and let one of the other capable and creative RevGals take the helm. It's been a great almost 17 months of co-hosting the F5, but it's time to say goodbye... so here's my swan song.

On Endings and Goodbyes:

1. Best ending of a movie/book/TV show: Well, one of my favorite movies of all time also has a wonderful ending: The Princess Bride. What a great ending! The most romantic kiss ever kissed in the history of kisses. Wow, I'm swooning just thinking about it. As for a book, partly because it's still fresh on my mind, but the ending of HP7 really was quite perfect. My hubby and I were both bawling toward the end, but then it all wrapped up nicely, but not boring and predictable. TV show? Can't think of one right now. I don't watch to much TV - well, I have to admit that I do watch Dancing with the Stars and So You Think You Can Dance, and I totally loved the ending of the last season of both - the right people won!

2. Worst ending of a movie/book/TV show: Well as for a movie, nothings coming to mind right now. Book - I would have to say the end of the 3rd of the Lord of the Ring Trilogy. And only because I got so wrapped up on the stories that while I was reading them my life basically stopped. I stopped socializing, practicing, studying, etc. I would get upset when someone would call me while I was trying to read. I just couldn't put them down. Anyway, I was close to the end of the 2nd book and thought that if I could just get to the end of it, I would take a break and come up for air. It was about 3:30 am one morning when I finally reached the end, and it leaves you on such a frustrating cliffhanger that I threw the book across the room in a rage and picked up the 3rd book and continued reading. So, really, that could also qualify as the best ending of a book. Again, with TV I can't really think of one.

3. Tell about a memorable goodbye you've experienced. When I was finishing my Masters in Organ Performance from TCU I was offered a job at a small music production company in NYC as a sound engineer. So, I decided that I would move up there as soon as I graduated. The ceremony was on Saturday, and the next day, Mother's Day, I moved to NYC. However, I had to say goodbye to my church. I didn't mind saying goodbye to the organ (not a fun instrument to try to lead with), but telling the choir that I was leaving and then saying goodbye to everyone was so difficult. They sent me off with a very generous gift, and lots of cards and well wishes. I'm still a member there, even though I've not lived in Ft. Worth since 2000. However, I do get to worship there this Sunday as I'm off this week for some family concerts and will be back down there on Sunday.*

4. Is it true that "all good things must come to an end"? Nope. I think all good things (and bad things for that matter) might take a temporary break in this life, but like everything else, they'll be renewed someday :). Otherwise, just shoot me now.

5. "Everything I ever let go of has claw marks on it." --Anne Lamott
Discuss. Somethings, sure, but once I decide to let go of something, generally, I'm ready to let it go and move on. On a very small scale, it's like when I've decided it's time to get my hair cut, I have to get it cut off RIGHT. THIS. VERY. MOMENT. Whenever I was dating and I realized that this particular guy was not who I was supposed to marry, I cut it off almost immediately. I leave claw marks on things that I don't want to let go, or things that I'm being forced to let go of... like my bed in the morning...

Bonus: "It isn't over until the fat lady sings." I've never loved this expression. So propose an alternative: "It isn't over until ____________________" It ain't over till the cows come home. No wait, I think that's a mixed metaphor. Hmmm... It ain't over till monkeys fly? Nope, did it again. Why does the lady have to be fat, and who cares if she's fat or not? And if its over when the lady sings, then lots of things should be over by now because I sing quite frequently, and I have been known to be pleasantly plump in my time. It ain't over till the candle is carried out... oh, hold on a minute... that's actually when it begins...

* For those of you in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, my family will be giving a concert in Duncanville (just south of Dallas) in the Duncanville Highschool auditorium at 7:30 pm. My mom, two sisters and I do a show called ClaviVoce - we each play piano and sing. We've got 4 pianos and do everything from Brahms to Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy, and every combination of 4 pianos and 4 voices. It's a fun show and it's free! We'll also be in Midland, TX on Tuesday, October 2nd, but I can't remember where exactly. If your in Midland/Odessa, we're apparently on the front page of the newspaper, or something like that. I'm pretty sure that one's free as well.

Three of the best years of my life

2007-09-25T23:10:00.000-05:00

Today, September 25th 2007, Jack and I celebrated our anniversary - 3 YEARS!!!! Wow, I can't believe it's been that long. It feels like just yesterday. Here are some pics from our wedding:

My little sister helping me apply fake eyelashes

Jack getting dressed. Also pictured with his head down is his best friend Huard. I met Huard in the 6th grade when he was sitting in my seat on the bus. When I asked him his name, I thought he said Qbert, so I've called him that for years :)

Just moments before becoming Jack's wife :)

Everyone singing one of my favorite hymns "God Is Here!" We were blessed to have the TCU Concert Chorale, conducted by Ronald Shirey sing for our wedding. Our processional was Antiphon from R. Vaughn Williams' Five Mystical Songs.

Processing out - We're Married!!! Isn't Jack handsome in a skirt.. urm... kilt?!?

In our getaway car after the wedding. We took all our pictures beforehand, and so when we walked down the isle, we just kept going and got into the back seat of our Prius. Jack's other best friend, Steve-O drove us around, stopping at the 7-11 for a slurppee before heading to the reception.

Thank you my dearest for 3 wonderful years. Wanna try for 3 more? :).

Friday Five: De-cluttering edition

2007-09-21T06:51:00.000-05:00

Sally at Eternal Echos brings us our Friday Five this week. She writes:

With Jo, Jon and Chris all moving to college and University accommodation there has been a big clear up going on in the Coleman household. We have been sorting and trying hard not just to junk stuff, but actually to get it to where it can be useful. On a brighter note we have used Freecycle ( check it out) to provide the twins with pots and pans etc that other folk were clearing out.

Making the most of our resources is important, I have been challenged this week by the amount of stuff we accumulate, I'd love to live a simpler lifestyle, it would be good for me, and for the environment I think...

With that in mind I bring you this Friday 5;

1. Are you a hoarder or a minimalist? I want to be a minimalist, but have to admit to some amount of hoarding. However, compared to my husband, minimalist would be an understatement. When we got married, I brought my clothes and a few boxes of books. He brought more stuff than I ever thought possible for one person to own, and 85% of that is books. I would love to own less stuff - it all just seems rather wasteful to me, especially when I'm dusting it!

2. Name one important object ( could be an heirloom) that you will never part with. My husband :). Seriously, I'm not quite sure. When I think through all my stuff, there are certainly some things that I would rather not have to part with, but nothing that jumps out at me as so important that I will never part with it. Almost everything can be replaced, or at least will always be in my memory. Most of my pictures are digitally saved. Hmmm, I'm not sure I could part with my computer, or at least most of the data on it :). I'm surprised that this is such a tough question for me.

3. What is the oldest item in your closet? Does it still fit??? I think the oldest thing is my bathrobe that I bought my freshman year in college, in 1991. It does still fit, though that's not saying much - it's a bathrobe, you know, one size fits most. The next oldest thing I can think of is a concert dress that I wore in my senior recital in 1995. That dress has been worn many times, for many concerts, in many places. I got my moneys worth out of that one. It has gone through many stages of fit and unfit. Currently it's a little loose on me. There have been times though that I couldn't get my big toe into it.

4.Yard sales- love 'em or hate 'em ? I've only done a couple in my life time. I kinda have mixed feelings about them. It's fun to go through the house and pick out stuff to get rid of, know that they'll get used some more and not thrown away just yet. But, it's also a whole lot of work, and I always seem to have lots of stuff left over.

5. Name a recycling habit you really want to get into. Well, I've recently joined Freecycle. Sally is right - you should check it out. It's amazing what people will take. I'd love to rig my house for water recycling. Instead of watering my lawn and plants with potable water, I'd save all the gray water and rain water for that purpose. I've even seen some really elaborate systems that take all the gray water and re-filter and clean it so you can use it again. That would be really cool.

And for a bonus- well anything you want to add.... I think recycling, using less stuff, and other ecologically minded activities can be a spiritual discipline, and one more way we can live out our baptisms. Our society's current consumeristic mindset is rather antithetical to the command to love our neighbor. Oooh, and it's so hard to buck against that trend. It's so much easier to drive my car 3 miles to church instead of ride my bike, even though I'm perfectly capable, have the luxury of owning a nice bike, and have a safe route to take. It's so much easier to just throw away leftovers and buy more food, instead of eating what I have, or at least composting what's gone bad. The list could go on.

Here are two websites that I've found that you might like to know about. One of them is a community of people striving to live generously and sharing their ideas and actions with one another: A Year of Living Generously. The other site doesn't have enough information on it, in my opinion - you have to purchase the book to get the rest. I have not purchased the book, yet. But the information about certain major companies business practices helps me make wiser choices about where I want to shop and who I want to give my money to: Better World Shopper.

Can It really be true?!?

2007-09-20T00:03:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure that I'm not dreaming, but the 6 weeks of classes are over!!! And, I'm not sure that I actually taught them anything. There was so much that got left undone and untouched, and Geeze - it's like that story of the Native American from Oklahoma who had never seen the ocean before. He was taken to California and saw it for the first time - after overcoming the shock he took a small glass jar and began to fill it with water. His companion asked him what he was doing, and he replied that his people had never seen the big water before. I feel like I've been trying to show these people the big ocean, but all I've got is this little mason jar full of water.

Oh well, one jar at a time, I suppose.

Anyway, Tuesday's class went really well. First the groups presented their "practicums" which were, honestly, a little predictable. The call to worship people did a responsive psalm reading, the proclamation people played a recording of a song, the response people had a children's sermon (which was really a proclamation instead of a response, but I'm not being picky) and the benediction was a responsive psalm reading. All stuff that we already do, but that's ok. I just wanted them to get started brainstorming as a group and planning something in a group. We talked a bit about other options we might have for each of the elements. Then, I touched on some major points that i wanted them to take away from the 6 weeks:

1. God ALWAYS acts first - God initiates any relationship with us
2. We respond - our worship should always have this basic movement of God initiating and us responding.
3. We have over 2000 years of rich worship resources from which to draw and to be informed by. Don't discount something because it's "too catholic" or because it's just not very presbyterian, etc. First be open to the option and then weigh whether or not it would effectively tell The Story in this current context, and if not, is there a way to make it so.
4. Because God's initiation demands a response, worship must be participatory and not passive. We cannot force people to participate, but we can certainly encourage or discourage it.
5. Worship is an act of the community - even private times of devotion and prayer happen in the context of community. It is important that our worship is a welcoming community - of all ages and types of people. We have to constantly be looking for how our worship might exclude people, and how we can fix that. It's not an easy task and one that requires vigilance (or "constant villigance", as my husband and I jokingly say).

Then, we were led to the Chapel by one of our group carrying the Christ Candle. I asked Jimmy to do it because he has always expressed how much the Christ Candle means to him in worship - watching it come down the isle, knowing that it represented the light of Christ in our midst, and watching it leave at the end, knowing that it represented the light of Christ leading us out into the world. Once at the chapel, we had a communion service that lasted about 40 min. Below is the transcript from that service. The intro to the Prayer of Confession, Assurance of Forgiveness, Prayers of the People, prayer after communion and the benediction are all taken from The Worship Source Book. (Copyright 2004 CRC Publications)

Call to worship Marlene
Leader: The Lord be with you
People: And also with you
Leader: Open our lips, oh Lord
People: And our mouths shall proclaim your praise
Leader: Glory be to the Father, to the Son and to the Holy Spirit
People: As it was in the beginning, is now
and will be forever.

Hear the Word of the Lord: Genesis Dave
1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
3 And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light.
6 And God said, "Let there be an expanse between the waters to separate water from water."
9 And God said, "Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear." And it was so.
11 Then God said, "Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds." And it was so.
14 And God said, "Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth." And it was so.
20 And God said, "Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky."
24 And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind." And it was so.
26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, [b] and over all the creatures that move along the ground."
27 So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.

Hymn: All Creatures of Our God and King 1, 4, 6

All respond: Thanks be to God, the Lord of all Creation

Hear the word of the Lord: Psalm 90:1-12 Susan
1 Lord, you have been our dwelling place
throughout all generations.
2 Before the mountains were born
or you brought forth the earth and the world,
from everlasting to everlasting you are God.
3 You turn men back to dust,
saying, "Return to dust, O sons of men."
4 For a thousand years in your sight
are like a day that has just gone by,
or like a watch in the night.
5 You sweep men away in the sleep of death;
they are like the new grass of the morning-
6 though in the morning it springs up new,
by evening it is dry and withered.
7 We are consumed by your anger
and terrified by your indignation.
8 You have set our iniquities before you,
our secret sins in the light of your presence.
9 All our days pass away under your wrath;
we finish our years with a moan.
10 The length of our days is seventy years—
or eighty, if we have the strength;
yet their span is but trouble and sorrow,
for they quickly pass, and we fly away.
11 Who knows the power of your anger?
For your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you.
12 Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Prayer of Confession: The proof of God’s amazing love is this: While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Trusting in God’s faithfulness and compassion, let us confess our sin before God and one another.

Kerry and Marilee alternate on the verses of These I Lay Down (John Bell) with the group joining in on the last line and also singing the last verse.

(Jane) Hear the Good News: God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. Indeed, God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. Friends believe the good news of God’s grace: In Jesus Christ, we are forgiven.

Psalm 103:1-4; 8-10; 12; 20-22
All: Bless the Lord, O my soul,
Lectern side: And all that is within me bless his holy name.
All: Bless the Lord, O my soul,
Pulpit side: And do not forget all his benefits
The Lord is merciful and gracious,
Lectern: Slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
Pulpit: He will not always accuse,
Lectern: Nor will he keep his anger forever.
He does not deal with us according to our sins
Pulpit: Nor repay us according to our iniquities.
Lectern: As far as east is from the west,
Pulpit: So far he removes our transgressions from us.
All: Bless the Lord, O you his angels,
Lectern: You mighty ones who do his bidding, obedient to his spoken word.
All: Bless the Lord, all his hosts
Pulpit: His ministries that do his will.
All: Bless the Lord, all his works,
Lectern: In all places of his dominion.
All: Bless the Lord, O my soul.

All respond: Thanks be to Christ, the redeemer of our souls

Hear the word of the Lord: John 14:15-17; 25-26 Debbie
15"If you love me, you will obey what I command. 16And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever— 17the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. 25"All this I have spoken while still with you. 26But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.

All respond: Thanks be to the Holy Spirit, the one who empowers our worship and sustains our faith.

Homily
You’ve received three items during this service. The longer stick, which you received first, represents God and God’s action in our lives. God initiates any and all relationships with us, and we respond to God’s call. When we heard the words of God’s creation at the beginning of our service, we responded with praise. But, we also responded with the realization that we are far from God. There is a vast chasm between us and God. But, once again, God acted first! God sent his Son Jesus on our behalf to bridge that gap. The shorter stick represents Jesus. Again, our response is required. We respond with our lives – not because it’s the right thing to do or because the law tells us, but because we are so overcome with thanksgiving. We responded in worship with our Psalm reading – blessing the Lord for the gift of grace and forgiveness we have in Jesus Christ. But, all this responding is empowered not by our own will and strength, but through the power of the Holy Spirit – the Advocate that Jesus sent. The Holy Spirit is represented by the ring. (2 sticks are held together as a cross with the rubber o ring) So, we are empowered to give the thanks and praise to the Father, Son and Holy Spirit that wells up inside of us. But, how do we show our thanks and praise? What does the Lord require of you, Micah asks. So, we cannot stop here in this room. We cannot come here to get filled up and comfortable – to be made to feel good and get our needs met. No, we must, if we truly are to respond to God’s love, grace and sustenance, we must go out in the world to Do Justice, Love Kindness and walk humbly with God. We must go out in the world to feed His sheep.

So we come to the table to be fed and nourished. Not so that we may become comfortable and content. Rather, that we may be strengthened to serve each other and the world, for the glory of God. And more specifically, that this group may serve this congregation in worship so that they may serve the world, for the glory of God. Let us join in prayer, offering our praise, thanksgiving, and intercession to God:

Prayers of the People

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Jimmy
we thank you for the gift of faith
worked within us by your Holy Spirit.
We thank you for having called us to yourself,
for consecrating us to your service,
for having set us apart to the sacred ministry of prayer.

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Sue
we pray for the church
in all her breadth and variety,
gathered out of every nation, family, people, and tongue,
to be a kingdom of priests serving you.
We pray for the church in all the world,
for churches in North America, Europe, and the Middle East,
for churches in Africa, Asia, and Latin America,
for young churches and old churches,
small churches and large churches,
weak churches and strong churches.
Grant to the church true lowliness
and genuine humility where there is pride, unity where there is division.
Grant to her truth where there is error and wisdom where there is folly,
that you might fulfill your purposes for her.

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Joyce
we pray for those stewards to whom you have
entrusted the affairs of your house,
for pastors, elders, deacons, lay leaders, volunteers, and committees.
Give them the spirit of willing service and true humility.
Give them a sense of spiritual devotion.
Give them delight in those whom they serve.
Grant that they may lead your people in the way of Christ,
that thereby we might all enter the land of our heritage.

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Marlene
we pray for all peoples of all nations.
We pray that in every land there might be peace and true justice
(especially in [country] and other places of conflict).
Grant that in our own communities
those who are troubled,
those who suffer,
those who are discouraged
might find support in time of need
especially from your church.
Particularly we remember before you
the work done for the troubled, the suffering, and the discouraged
by the deacons in our congregations
and denominational and Christian agencies.

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Matt
we pray for our nation and
those who lead the nation:
the president/prime minister and advisors,
the congress/parliament and the courts,
the diplomatic corps as they negotiate for peace and justice.
We pray for the leaders of all nations,
that they might know that you have called them
to serve their people in your fear and
for your glory and the good of the peoples.

O Lord and Father of the household of faith, Ann
we pray for those who have special needs.
To all who suffer any sickness or weakness [especially names(s)],
give health and strength.
To all who are disturbed or troubled, give rest and understanding.
To all who are lonely and alienated, give fellowship and love.
To all who grieve and sorrow [especially name(s)],
give comfort and assurance.
To all who are aged and frail, give homes of comfort and safety,
and others to help them, and a willingness to accept help.

All these requests we present to you, Amy
O Father of mercy, in the name of Jesus Christ,
who even now is seated at your right hand to intercede for us
and who taught us to pray, Our Father…..

Our Lord Jesus, told the apostles, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you.” We have the peace of Christ, through the power of the Holy Spirit, which guides us toward the perfect unity of God’s kingdom. Let us share this peace with each other. (Peace of Christ, Susan…)

Communion
Bryan invites the group around the table for the words of institution. He offers a prayer and we hold hands as a family around the dinner table. Each person serves the next person, saying something like: “Sue, this is the body of Christ, broken for you, etc.”

Let us pray:
Lord God,
in gratitude, in deep gratitude
for this moment, this meal, these people,
we give ourselves to you.
Take us out to live as changed people
because we have shared the living bread
and cannot remain the same.
Ask much of us, expect much from us,
enable much by us, encourage many through us.
So Lord, may we live to your glory,
both as inhabitants of earth
and citizens of the commonwealth of heaven. Amen.

Hymn: Be Thou My Vision

Benediciton:
Go into the world: dance, laugh, sing and create
We go with the assurance of God’s blessing
Go into the world: risk, explore, discover, and love.
We go with the assurance of God’s grace.
Go into the world: believe, hope, struggle, and remember.
We go with the assurance of God’s love.
Thanks be to God.

Friday Five: Meetings Meetings

2007-09-14T08:45:00.000-05:00

Our Friday Five topic is about meetings and is brought to us by ReverendMother. She writes:

In honor of a couple of marathon meetings I attended this week:

1. What's your view of meetings? Choose one or more, or make up your own:
a) When they're good, they're good. I love the feeling of people working well together on a common goal.
b) I don't seek them out, but I recognize them as a necessary part of life.
c) The only good meeting is a canceled meeting.

Definitely A. I'm all about teams working together. However, the opposite is also true. When they're bad, THEY'RE BAD!!! There are some meetings that leave me so drained that I just want to go home and crawl into bed for weeks. This usually is associated with slow speaking or inarticulate speakers. We've had our weekly staff meetings canceled 3 weeks in a row and it's driving me crazy. First of all I wanted to share with the staff all the stuff we've been doing in the worship planning team training sessions, and secondly, why would we NOT have a meeting the week fall programing starts back up is beyond me! There were so many issues that needed to be addressed the past few weeks that just got left hanging because we didn't meet. So, meetings are necessary, and when they're good, they're great!

2. Do you like some amount of community building or conversation, or are you all business? I think community building is vital if the meetings are actually going to get anything done. It's not necessary to do a ropes course at each meeting, but if, through consistent work, a community is built where the trust level is high and the ego level is low, the meetings can be ever so much more productive than just a 'business only' gathering. I'm all about community (see my last post).

3. How do you feel about leading meetings? Share any particular strengths or weaknesses you have in this area. Leading meetings is not my favorite thing to do. I'm never really sure how to keep the conversation on task. There always seems to be someone leading the topic off in another direction than it needs to go. I'm not very good at being the 'tough one.' My problem on the other side is that I have a tendency to jump into any conversation and stick my nose into areas outside my jurisdiction. It's not unusual for me to be an active memeber in a conversation at staff about the nursery program, or adult discipleship, or any other subject matter other than music. So, I apparently have this need to be leading everything, even though I really don't want to. Really, I think it's a matter of patience. I don't always have much patience for people who talk really slowly, or who are not very concise and end up using 5 long sentences when it could have been said in 2 words. Looking back at this answer, perhaps I'm just seeing myself in other people :)

4. Have you ever participated in a virtual meeting? (conference call, IM, chat, etc.) What do you think of this format? Part of my course work for this degree involved conversations on a message board. It wasn't really real time - we didn't have to meet on the board at a specified time, just had to post and respond before a certain date. I liked this format because I could think before I spoke (posted). I'm usually not good at that in a real meeting. As for a real-time virtual meeting? I can't recall ever doing something like that.

5. Share a story of a memorable meeting you attended. Well, the only memorable meeting that's coming to mind was not a happy one. Why is it the bad ones are the memorable ones? This was a special called meeting of the staff on a Monday morning in June 2 years ago. Our senior pastor called the meeting so he could announce that he was leaving because he had broken his marriage and ordination vows by having an affair with a parishioner. I had known something was afoot but couldn't put a finger on what was wrong. I had a feeling for some reason that he was going to be leaving, but thought it was perhaps his wife's health or something like that. But this was so far out of the blue the wind was literally knocked out of me, the carpet ripped out from under my feet, the floor dropped, the anvil fell, on and on and on. Never, NEVER in a million years would I have suspected that. I knew this pastor and his family for over 15 years. I had spent many a night at their home, played scrabble and trivial pursuit with their kids, talked politics, religion, shared personal problems, leaned on them, introduced various boyfriends to them, and even changed my whole career path after a time of working with him in ministry. As it turned out, it wasn't just one person either! How did I miss that completely? I think I must be good at ignoring things I don't want to see. I like to say that I like to assume the best in people, but sometimes I feel like perhaps I'm just to cowardly to recognize the truth. I never want to have another meeting like that again!

Gosh, I hate to leave it on such a terrible note. So, let me brighten the post a bit by saying that this incident was one in a long line of awful incidents that didn't destroy this congregation, but rather brought it together, forged some awesome leaders and forced those leaders to really strive to listen to God first and last. God really does work miracles through broken vessels.

Oh, here's a funny meeting (well, sort of a meeting) story. Last night during choir practice we stopped rehearsal to have a brief bit of announcements. Our assistant choir director was talking about a visiting ensemble coming in October and that we needed to house 35 people. She made the point that these were all adults and that in this situation (which is different than normal) if you could only house 1 person, that was ok. Normally we never have fewer than 2 in a house. This little old lady who had lost her husband about 2 years ago piped up and said, "Can I have a single male, please?" I think the choir laughed for about 10 min.

Only one left?!?!?!!

2007-09-13T23:16:00.000-05:00

My, my, how time flies. Tuesday we had our 5th class and it went much better than last weeks. We were talking about community, symbols and the arts in worship. So for our worship time at the beginning of class I had a number of symbols set up around the room: bread and wine; water in a clear bowl; a dish of sand with a fish drawn in it; a candle; a cross (one that has special meaning to our congregation); a picture of a crusty old shepherd counting his sheep; a picture of a dove diving downward; some braided ropes from one of our earlier classes; and a mirror. We began by singing 2 verses of All Things Bright and Beautiful. Then, I read from Genesis 1:26-27 from The Message translation: God spoke: 'Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature so they can be responsible for the fish in the sea and the birds of the air, the cattle and yes the Earth itself, and every animal that moves on the face of the earth.' God created human beings, he created them godlike, reflecting God's nature. He created them male and female." I said a very short sentence or two expounding on this passage and how God relates to us - makes himself known to us - in the created order and especially through each other. And so we use symbols in worship to help us speak about God and about what God has done. None of the symbols we use is God, and none of them could possibly ever come close to showing all of who God is. Rather, they are little glimpses and signposts that point us to God. Then I invited the class to visit the various symbols around the room. They were invited to interact with the symbols and listen for God speaking to them and to look to where the symbols pointed - to God. It was fascinating to watch them. At first, they were hesitant, and just looked. But then, one person picked up the cross and talked with the person next to him about where that particular cross had come from. Then, suddenly people felt free to really interact with the symbols. Some played in the water, one person ran his hands through the sand - he saw a different symbol than I had planned. He saw the grains of sand, as numerous as the people of the nations of Abraham and reveled in how God knew each grain intimately. One person saw the ropes and remembered the lesson. He counted them and realized that I had put one there for each person in the room, so he took his. Later, he admitted to taking it, and I let everyone else know that there was one for them as well. We closed with two verses of For the Beauty of the Earth, and a responsive benediction that I found in The Worship Sourcebook.

For the main portion of the class, we talked about community and how community is a basic fact of being a human and also being a child of God. Trip Huggins, over at Conjectural Navel Gazing: Jesus in Lint Form wrote a post yesterday about community that was very similar to what I talked about in class about community. Here's a link to the actual post: Saving Communities.

I then referred back to our worship time and how God created us in his image. We are a symbol of God and all of us as a community make up the Church universal that is a symbol of the Body of Christ here on earth. We talked more about symbols and their importance in worship - and their danger. We talked about symbols here at WPC and how sometimes the symbols we have around our church give unintended messages. We talked about the fine line between a powerful symbol that is rooted and connected to our history, important to our lives as a community that points to God, and a symbol that has become more important than that to which it is pointing - a symbol that has become a sacred cow.

This conversation then led from symbols to the role of arts in worship. We discussed various forms of art (visual, musical, drama, dance, language, etc.) and when we've experienced it in our worship services. Music is the very dominant art at WPC - many people have joined the church because of our music program. That's not necessarily a good thing. We hope that if they come because of the music, they'll stay because of God. As a music staff, we work hard to make sure our music is always in the context of ministry and not performance. I digress... We watched a YouTube video that I found - an example of drama in worship and how powerfully drama can tell the story. I don't see is doing this kind of drama in our church - at least not yet. We're a pretty formal, traditional church. But, I wanted them to see the possibilities out there. Here's the video:

Some of the reactions were positive to this, some were negative. Some were really put off by the violence in the skit and couldn't get past that. This led to a frank conversation about how our worship really needs to be honest about life. God ultimately prevails and there is hope, but here in this already-but-not-yet time somethings in this life really suck. And our worship will never be relevant, no matter what kind of music we use, if we're not honest about that. The psalms are bluntly honest about the suckiness of life, so why do we think we can't be.

Overall, it was a really good class. For their homework, I gave them a short article out of Call to Worship: Liturgy, Music, Preaching and the Arts Vol. 39.4 titled "Confessions of a Liturgical Artist." I also gave asked them to read an article by Sally Morgenthaler at the website Allelon: A Movement of Missional Leaders. You should go and read that article. Next Tuesday is our last one and then we get down to the real business of planning worship together. I feel that we have only barely scratched the surface. There's so much more to know and find out about worship. One of the hardest things about planning these classes has been trying to figure out what NOT to cover. I feel almost like we've got just enough information now to be really dangerous.

On Tuesday, we'll actually being with class - wrapping up, talking specifically about worship planning and getting a preview on the worship services that we will be planning etc. Then at 7:15 we will journey to the Chapel for a longer worship service which will include Communion. Then, we will get together Friday evening and Saturday morning to start planning.

It's been a wild ride and it ain't even half way over yet...

I'm so tired

2007-09-09T22:18:00.000-05:00

At this point, I'm running on gas fumes. This process is really getting to me. Trying to complete a doctoral thesis while holding down a way-more-than-full-time-job. On top of it, I'm not the most organized person, nor do I have the best time management skills. so, I'm running on very little sleep. I never did post on last weeks class, so I'll share a bit here about it:

Admittedly, it was not the best class so far. I was not as organized and was just really tired. I'm just really tired already this week, but I'm much more prepared for Tuesday's class. Hopefully, I'll survive tomorrow (another marathon day) and make it to Tuesday morning. Anyway, back to last week's class. Oh, geeze, I can't even remember that far back. Thank goodness I'm taping these. I know we talked about liturgy and what it is and means and why we should care. As well we talked about the Book of Confessions and the Book of Order of the PC(USA) and what those documents have to tell us about worship. It really was probably my least creative class. Just a bunch of talking and rather unenthusiastic discussion. Oh well, they all can't be home run hits, right?

This week, we're looking at worship and community; symbols and their role in worship; and arts in worship (music, dance, visual, drama, language arts, etc.) For their homework this last week I gave them different sections of worship to plan with a focus on congregational engagement. We'll present some of those in class this week as well. It's kind of their first foray into worship planning - a practicum, if you will.

I really must get to sleep now... as soon as Jack and I finish listening to our favorite radio program: NPR's Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me

Friday Five: On Overcoming

2007-09-07T10:10:00.000-05:00

For those of you who don't know about RevGalBlogPals, these Friday Fives are a group activity at that blog ring. So, they'll generally be off thesis topic, though I'm sure I'll find some way to work my thesis into these Friday Fives on a regular basis. Sally provides this week's Friday Five:

I am preparing this Friday 5 just before I take Chris into hospital for a cardioversion, right now we are all a little apprehensive. But this whole thing has got me thinking, so many of us are overcomers in one way or anoither, so many have amazing stories to tell of God's faithfulness in adversity. And so I bring you this Friday 5;

1.Have you experienced God's faithfulness at a difficult time? Tell as much or as little as you like... Yes yes and yes. Though I am rarely aware of God's faithfulness in the valley. It's always looking back that I see God's hand. Why I can't seem to learn from the hindsight that God is always faithful is beyond me. But at the same time, just the intellectual knowledge and weak hope that God is faithful brings me through the difficult times. Other times, it's those around me who have strength, faith and hope for me that bring me through. The Body of Christ in action!

2. Have you experienced a dark night of the soul, if so what brought you through? I hesitate to say that I have had as dark a night of the soul as some but feel that I've had tastes of it now and then. Once, in undergraduate school, I went for about 3 weeks of depression that had me crying most days, and usually at the odd drop of a hat. Just the briefest thought about singing (I was a voice major and dealing with some throat problems) sent me spiraling down a thought path that led to a life with no music, no singing and basically destitution. So, that was definitely a dark night of the soul. Throughout this doctoral program I've had days here and there of serious doubt about more than just my ability to complete the program, but serious doubts about God. Sometimes these moments of physical, clawing, emptiness will last for a few hours, sometimes for a few days. I even blogged about it a little here. It's hard to say what has brought me through. I think for the most part it's those people around me who care for me. Sometimes, I will scream out to God and suddenly feel the darkness lift and peace overcome me.

3. Share a Bible verse, song, poem that has brought you comfort? Psalm 23. I have sung this one so many times, in so many different versions, and heard it read more times than I can count at countless funerals and it never looses its impact. So many verses and songs have brought me comfort that it's hard to narrow it down to just one or even a few. Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing comes to mind. Philippians 4:13: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

4. Is "why suffering" a valid question? Are there any invalid questions? We may not get the answer we're looking for, though I'm finding that God's answers are always infinitely better than anything I could even think to look for. If we don't ask "why suffer" then perhaps we would not be moved to help alleviate suffering in the world and isn't that part of what Jesus calls us to do? Comfort those who morn, care for the widows and orphans, heal the sick, pray for those in prison, etc.

5. And on a lighter note- you have reached the end of a dark and difficult time- how are you going to celebrate? With shouts of joy in the courts of the Lord! And perhaps a glass of wine and laughter with friends. I can't imagine any where else in the world I'd rather be than in the company of friends and family in both times of sorrow and in times of joy. I was one of those weird people who loved living the dorms because I was surrounded by so many people and the part I loved most about living in New York City was the extreme close proximity I had to more than a million people.

The Gospel in Paint

2007-09-01T15:55:00.000-05:00

A couple of posts ago, I wrote about how, as part of an assignment, each person was to write the Gospel Story in their own voice. They could write a short story, a poem, a song, paint it, dance it, sing it, quilt it, whatever. One of the students painted 4 small paintings about the gospel. I asked her if I could share them here, and she graciously agreed. Thank you, Sue.

For each painting, she wrote a short description and I'll include those descriptions under each one:
"God so loved the world that he sent the Son made man to dwell among us. The light came into the darkness"

"He came to show us the Father and to bring us back to the Father. The Way, the Truth, the Life. The sacrificial lamb - the solution - He is the bridge to the Holy God for sinful mankind."

"Christ took our sins - became sin on the cross (at-one-ment). We have been redeemed, His blood cleanses us. God sees us through Him. In Christ we are heirs to eternal life."

"The Creator; Yahweh; Jehovah; Father/Son/Holy Spirit; Love beyond all knowledge"

Each of these four paintings are © 2007 Sue Cappadona, All Rights Reserved.

Friday Five: Seasons Change

2007-08-31T10:14:00.000-05:00

It's Labor Day weekend here in the United States, also known as Summer's Last Hurrah. So let's say goodbye to summer and hello to the autumn. (People in other climes, feel free to adapt as needed.)

1. Share a highlight from this summer. (If you please, don't just say "our vacation to the Canadian Rockies." Give us a little detail or image. Help us live vicariously through you!) I had a really great summer, so it's hard to find just one highlight. But, I'll mention our vacation in Watercolor Florida, riding bikes everywhere we went. Here's a picture

We loved riding bikes around so much that we bought new bikes when we got home and now I ride my bike to work about 3 or 4 days a week.

2. Are you glad to see this summer end? Why or why not? Yes because I miss all the various choirs and musical ensembles that only meet during the school year. I have to admit that it's nice to have a break from all the evening rehearsals during the summer, but I'm ready to give up my Monday, Wednesday and Thursday nights again. Now, If I can just convince the ABC to air the new shows of Grey's Anatomy during the summer and reruns during the school year, I'd be a happy gal :)

3. Name one or two things you're looking forward to this fall. I look forward to playing for chancel choir and directing our handbell choir, Evensong. I also look forward to the completion of the application portion of my thesis. Though the intense 3 months of writing that will follow I'm not looking forward to.

4. Do you have any special preparations or activities to mark the transition from one season to another? (Cleaning of house, putting away summer clothes, one last trip to the beach) In a normal year, the end of summer is usually celebrated by attending Bloys Campmeeting down in Ft. Davis, TX. This is an old cowboy campmeeting, that began in 1890 by Rev. Bloys, a traveling Presbyterian preacher. He would travel from ranch to ranch to minister to those many ranchers who could not come to church on a regular basis. If you know anything about West Texas ranching, you know those ranches are HUGH, and back in the 1890s traveling to go to church was a long ordeal. So, they decided that one week a year all the ranch families would get together for a revival. Well, jump ahead nearly 120 years and that campmeeting is still going. There are about 4000 - 5000 people who go, mostly descended from those original 10 ranching families. Church meets 4 times a day with Presbyterian, Methodist, Baptist and Disciples ministers rotating the services. I've been going since 1990 when my mom was hired to be the pianist. Now, my dad is also the song leader, but the past couple of years he and I have been sharing the job. I just couldn't go this year because of the thesis, so I'm having a bit of trouble adjusting to the fact that fall is here. It's like going one December without Christmas! Seriously!

5. I'll know that fall is really here when __________________________________. When you can smell it in the air and you stop wearing sleeveless shirts. There's nothing quite like that fall crisp smell to the air. I don't know what it is, but every season has its own smell, and I just love the smell of autumn.

Image is The Four Seasons I by Pham An Hai (More info here)

3 down, 3 to go

2007-08-28T12:45:00.001-05:00

So, after each of these sessions, I'm amazed at how well they each have gone. For this particular lesson I felt the least prepared, but it really went beautifully. First, I must tell about our worship time. As part of their homework last week, I asked each person to tell the gospel story in their own words (or painting, or sculpture, or drawing, or dance or song, etc.) and that they would get a chance to share it this week. Our worship time centered around those stories. The telling of these stories was framed by the reading of 3 psalms - Psalm 95:1-7; Psalm 42; Psalm 118:1-7, 15-18, 28-29. For the first reading, we all stood with our arms raised in praise as the early Christians might have done. Then the first group of people shared their gospel stories and taped them to or laid them next to a big wooden cross. Then we listened to Psalm 42 read as we knelt in a posture of humility and repentance, as this was a psalm of lament. Then the next group of people shared. Finally we closed with a group responsive reading of Psalm 118. I had printed up the psalm in 4 different versions and everyone was instructed to read the bold lines on their page, which resulted in 4 different groups reading different lines. Sometimes it was 3 groups, sometimes it was 2 groups. And I asked them to be just as dramatic and emphatic in their reading as the other two readings had been. And they were! We closed with prayer.

The great part about this worship time was hearing the many different gospel stories:

One person had written a poem and printed it up on a large piece of paper - apparently she and I were both at Kinkos late last night :). She said that she felt it was kind of a 4th grade poem, rather sing-song-y, but at the same time, she felt that 4th grade was about where she was at with her faith. I would differ with her on that - for someone who has come to faith later in life, she's more mature than many life long Christians I know.

Another person designed a quilt that she plans on making. It is a picture of a fruit tree, with it's roots in good soil (faith), the sun shining on it giving it life (Jesus), the wind blowing through it (the Spirit), and I can't remember what represented God. But anyway, the fruit on the tree is the Fruit of the Spirit, but she explained that you don't just get the fruit right away, but by living a life rooted in faith and in the ways of Jesus. Also, the fruit falls off, and that shows how we have to continually be growing and renewing in faith to continue to bear fruit.

One person had printed up a series of symbols, and I can't remember exactly what they were, but they were really cool. Apparently he started with symbols that some early TV doctor used to write on a chalk board (obviously, this show was before my time) - Man, Woman, life, death, and infinity. Then he changed them - Man, Woman, life (a sunburst) and death (a lower case t cross) were the same, but then, he added a simple cross representing grace and finally a celtic type cross (I can't find an example of it) whose lines are completely connecting that he said represented eternity.

One of my favorites was from an artist who painted 4 miniature canvasses. I'm going to ask her permission to scan them and post them here. They were beautiful, and I can't even begin to describe them.

For the rest of the class, we tried to cover 2000+ years of history in 45 min. HAHA. I just touched on a couple of times and places to give them a kind of over arching picture of the history of the church. As we talked about each one (an early house church described by Justin Martyr, 4th century worship with description of Augustine, the Catholic church by the 1500s, the reformation in very brief form [we were running out of time] and finally the worship renewal movement of the past 40 years since Vatican II) I had them sit or stand in a similar way that the church we were discussing would have sat or stood to worship. So, for the house church, we sat on the floor, for Augustine, we stood, men on one side, women on the other, etc. Finally to talk about the worship renewal time, I had them all sit in a tight circle and as I described how each tradition seems to be learning from the other (the catholic church with it's renewed focus on the Word; the free church traditions beginning to incorporate ritual and sacraments in their worship, etc.) I gave each person one end of a cord. The cords (one for each person) were different colors and sizes and materials. As I talked I took the other end of each of the cords and began to twist them together, pointing out how they are becoming a stronger cord, but each cord still shows its own color and texture. I said that perhaps this is an idealist picture and maybe we wont really see this kind of convergence until the New Heavens and New Earth, but that perhaps we are starting to move this direction, and who knows what may come in this postmodern era, and whatever era is to come after that. (well, God probably knows :) I tied this picture back to the picture they had created with their gospel stories and the myriad of stories that make up the bible and how each of us sees a different facet of the diamond, a different cord color/texture of the big rope that all make up this beautiful thing called the Body of Christ. Ok, go ahead, call me an idealist, it's true.

Good class! I'm blown away by this group of people and their creativity. I know those gospel stories will show up again sometime. I don't know how or when, but they will.

Finally, I want to add a prayer that one of the team members shared with me after class. It was a prayer that formed in his mind as he observed the lunar eclipse this morning (did you see it? It was quite beautiful!). I've asked Matt's permission to share this prayer. May it be a blessing to you as it was for me:

Lord, we witnessed a magnificent visualization of your creation this morning. As the glorious Earth we inhabit passed between the sun, which sits at the center of our solar system, and the moon, which perpetually encircles us, it created the wonderful spectacle of a lunar eclipse. Let it remind us that so too does your son sit at the center of our own journey of faith, and that your love encompasses us forever. As the moon, which has always been a fixture sitting high above us, briefly faded from our view this morning, let us reflect that although we may sometimes struggle to see your presence, you are always there to bring us out of the darkness into your light. Amen.

Cultural Friday 5

2007-08-24T13:12:00.000-05:00

This Friday 5 looks like a lot of fun and is brought to us by Sally at Eternal Echoes.

I have spent the week at Summer School studying the Gospel and Western culture, we have looked at art, literature, music, film and popular culture in their myriad expressions. With that in mind I bring you the cultural Friday 5.

For each of the following name one that has helped you/challenged you on your spiritual journey.

1. Book - Just one book? I've read so many books in the past 3 years for this degree that I my head spins when I try to think about it. Laurence Hull Stookey has written a trilogy of books: Calendar: Christ's Time for the Church; Baptism: Christ's Act in the Church; and Eucharist: Christ's Feast with the Church. I have read Calendar and Baptism, and Eucharist is on my list. It's hard to say what exactly about these books has been formational for me, but Calendar and and Baptism have been instrumental for the development of my own general theology and theology of worship. Baptism especially really helped me to understand the amazing depth of meaning and mystery available in this sacrament.

2. Piece of music - well, it really depends on what is singing in my head. I can think of a couple pieces that jump out at me immediately - The Brahms German Requiem is a big one. It's hard to pin down exactly what about it has been influential to me, but the words and melodies resonate in my soul, especially when I read the Scripture passages quoted. Frequently I'll hear in my head "How Lovely are Thy Dwellings" or "For All Flesh Is As Grass." Hymns and other congregational song are so important to me and I believe to the life of the church So, I would be remiss if I didn't mention some of my favorite hymns: Love Divine, All Love's Excelling - this is a wonderful exposition on the Trinity. Fred Pratt Green's God is Here - a beautiful picture of the church. A Mighty Fortress - a sermon unto itself. All in All is a favorite of our congregation and our children led the congregation in singing it on VBS Sunday. Those children truly led worship!

3. Work of art - One of my professors, Reggie Kidd introduced me to Georges Roualt and his depictions of Christ and other people (and the blurring of lines between Christ and other people) will not soon leave my imagination. I can see them so clearly in my minds eye.

4. Film - Hmmmm.... Well, I loved all the Harry Potter films and books and I'm not sure how they might have helped me or challenged on my spiritual journey but they do resonate some unending truths about life with each other and our own responses to all that is in us and outside of us. I'm just drawing a blank on any films right now...

5. Unusual engagement with popular culture - Well, I think any engagement with culture, popular or otherwise, usual or unusual, shapes who we are. We cannot be immune to change and influence from our surroundings.

Bonus: Is engagement essential to your Christian faith, how and why? ABSOLUTELY! For me, engagement indicates more than just an outward involvement (going through the motions, if you will) in whatever activity, in this case, faith, but a commitment and involvement of the heart. Intentional engagement, I guess is more what I'm trying to get at. Oh, I'm not coming up with anything succinct and deep right now so I'm just going to leave it at that.

Thoughts during a staff meeting

2007-08-21T22:18:00.001-05:00

I know that title just gets you all excited. Isn't staff meeting where you all have your best thoughts? Actually, most of the time I'm either fighting to keep myself awake, or fighting to keep my mouth shut lest I deafen the rest of the staff with my screams of frustration. Well... maybe it's not that bad. Because today, I actually connected the dots on something that's been bothering me lately.

On Sunday, our pastor, Bryan, had preached on Romans 5:1-11, focusing especially on the passage about rejoicing in our suffering. He made the point that God doesn't usually take us out of our suffering, but walks with us through it.

Today, we were having a special 'visioning' staff meeting and Bryan described the process we needed to go through as a 'tunnel of chaos.' God wants us to work our way through this chaos - there is no easy answer for this. God works through our sufferings, through our chaos to help us grow.

So, I was contemplating how every bit of this thesis has been hard won for me so far. I'll start out a time of study with prayer, asking for God to help me do this, cause I know I can't do it myself. But inspiration rarely comes at that point. Then, I proceed to bang my head against the wall, pulling my teeth out as I try to study (I'm easily distracted). I'll get down to the wire and hit my panic button (bless my dear sweet husband for putting up with this process). Then - then, on my knees because I have nowhere else to go, I really really pray "Dear God - I can't do it, you have to write it for me." Then, miraculously, I have a break through. And, I hit myself upside the head and wonder why I didn't think to ask for that earlier, and why, once again, I didn't trust that God would guide me.

So, my big light bulb moment came when I realized that just because I pray for help doesn't mean that God's just going to drop the information (or whatever else I need) in my lap.
I really have to do the hard work, as much as it pains me so. Otherwise, I just won't learn what I need to learn. Unfortunately, as revelatory as this light bulb was for me, it didn't really make me feel any better. Oh yeah, I know I can trust in the Lord. I can trust that the Lord is going to walk with me through the suffering... ok, maybe sometimes God won't be walking with me - God will be dragging me, kicking and screaming through the suffering.

Hmmm... perhaps the suffering wouldn't be so bad if I didn't fight it so much... Nah! I really am quite good at kicking and screaming.

Class #2 down 4 more to go

2007-08-21T21:40:00.000-05:00

Once again, this morning went a lot better than my nightmares let on. It was a bit more difficult than last week for everyone. Today's class and next week are both difficult to make interactive. Today was Biblical foundations and next week is Historical foundations. So, the majority of the class time entailed listening to me yap my jaw and look at power point slides.

However, since for part of the lesson we were looking at the various Hebrew words associated with worship, I figured I'd make them do at least one of them. So, as part of our worship time, I taught them a very simple call and answer song, and then explained that the Hebrew word "gil", which is usually translated "rejoice" actually means dance. So, we danced :). I told them that the advantage of meeting at 6:30 in the morning was that it was highly unlikely that anyone would walk in on them dancing, so they could really get into it and REJOICE!! So, they really did get into it. I was, once again, quite surprised. And then, once we finished dancing and singing, someone pointed out that the video camera had be rolling the whole time :) Hahahahaha! I have evidence that Presbyterians can dance and raise their hands in worship!

Anyway, it went really well. Yippiee!

Class #2... here we go

2007-08-21T05:48:00.001-05:00

Ok, in less than an hour Class #2 will begin. This one has been a hard won battle. I mean really, how am I supposed to give a Biblical overview of worship in less than an hour?!?! Not to mention that it's 6:30 in the morning and everyone's still asleep. We'll see how it goes. It won't be as interactive and 'postmodern' as last week. There's just so much information to disseminate, so it's mostly lecture style. I tried to spice it up as much as possible with visuals and such. I was going to post my class notes here like I did for Class #1 but that will have to wait until this evening. I have to clean a couple things up and make sure I credit the right people and whatnot before publishing on the web.

If you're awake, say a prayer for us.

Review of the first meeting

2007-08-17T09:04:00.001-05:00

Tuesday went really well. I had nightmares about it all night long. You know the kind - everything that can possibly go wrong did go wrong. In my dream I ran screaming and crying out of the room after about an hour and a half of futile attempts at starting the class. It was awful. And then, I woke up. I've never been so happy to wake up in all my life.

My dear sweet husband, Jack, offered to film each of the classes so I would have a good record of what happened each week. After starting the coffee, setting up the chairs and getting the power point up and running we began right at 6:30. Amazingly only 1 person was late! And, I kinda expected her to be late :).

First, we had a time of worship. We started with a short responsive call to worship, followed that with a responsive reading of Psalm 23. This was the text for worship last Sunday, and worked wonderfully as a beginning text for our class. We sang My Shepherd Will Supply My Need, one phrase at a time, interspersed within the reading of the Psalm. Then, I said a few words about the text, relating it to Bryan's sermon from Sunday - about how God desires to be with us, and how we will begin our time together asking for God to be with us throughout this process.

Then, we had an extended time of prayer, which went so much better than I anticipated. These are tried and true frozen chosen Presbyterians who don't pray out loud. I was a little nervous about how they would react to the prayer I was asking them to participate in. I had a large piece of butcher paper spread out on a table with a bunch of markers. The paper was divided into 4 headings: Praise, Presence, Petition and Thanksgiving. I began each section, offering a sentence prayer (a word of Praise, then a statement about God's abiding presence, next a petition for what I hoped to accomplish in this process, and finally a word of Thanksgiving), and after saying it, I wrote it down on the butcher paper and invited everyone else to do the same. Everyone! Participated! And, without apology or having to be prodded. They just jumped right in with both feet. But what was especially beautiful about this was how the majority of the people wrote their words - in decent and orderly lines :). They were willing to step out of their comfort zones, but remained true to their presbyterian roots. What a delightful surprise.

Finally, we ended our worship time by singing Be Thou My Vision.

After a short break for coffee and donuts, we sat down, I passed out binders that I had prepared for everyone. I was going to add a picture of the binder cover my husband designed, but since it's in PDF form, Blogger won't let me display it as a picture. If I figure out how to do it later, I'll add it in - I'm quite proud of it (Yeah Jack!)

On the top of each of their class note and homework pages I had included an image of the Alpha and Omega that I found in this book: Visuals for Worship by Elizabeth Steele Halstead. This, I explained was to remind us of God's presence and how we must begin and end with God, putting God's will first and not our own.

We had a lively discussion about what worship means to each of us, what participation means, and what participation in worship means. Then, I gave them about 8 min. to recall a corporate worship service that had a strong impact on them, reflect on what that impact was, and then draw a conclusion about worship based upon that reflection. We had only time to discuss 3 or 4 of them, and then I had to close out the class, describing their homework for the week, and let them go.

Before they did, I had them sign up to provide breakfast for one of the remaining 5 weeks. I explained that it did not need to be fancy - just prepared with the knowledge in mind that by bringing food, they are taking part in nourishing this team and that nourishment will help to draw this team of people in closer communion with each other.

We closed in prayer, and that was it. I was quite pleased with the level of engagement of each person in the group - 14 people total. So, now I'm in the library all day today and tomorrow to prepare for this coming Tuesday - Biblical and Theological Foundations for Worship.

Speaking of which.... back to work for me :)

Friday Five: Word Association Redux

2007-08-17T08:58:00.000-05:00

Here's another Friday Five from the RevGalsBlogPals ring. This one's a short and sweet version:

This one is patterned off an old Friday Five written by Songbird, our Friday Five Creator Emerita:

Below you will find five words. Tell us the first thing you think of on reading each one. Your response might be simply another word, or it might be a sentence, a poem or a story.

1. vineyard: trees and wasps

2. root: abega

3. rescue: miners

4. perseverance: making it through this thesis

5. divided: a house will not stand

(Each of these appears in one of the readings from this Sunday's lectionary.)

One class down, 5 to go

2007-08-16T15:37:00.000-05:00

Well, so far so good. We had our first class meeting this past Tuesday morning. It went very well. In fact, it went much better than what my nightmare the night before showed me. It's an amazing group of people that God has amassed for this project. Of course, now, the bar is set very high for the rest of them, so I've got my work cut out for me. I'm in the library right now getting ready for next week, so I really should be doing that instead of blogging. I will post later tonight a brief summary of Tuesday's meeting and my plans for next Tuesday.

thanks for all you who are reading - even if I don't know who you are, it's encouraging to know that there are people out there cheering me on through this process.

I Love to Tell the Story...

2007-08-07T22:02:00.000-05:00

'twill be my theme in glory.
to tell the old, old story
of Jesus and His love.

This evening, my husband and I had an opportunity to see a show called Once On This Island. It was a beautiful story that is similar in theme to The Little Mermaid.* But much deeper and more lasting that a cute Disney story. The show is told by a group of peasants as a fairy tale to a little girl, a story of how love is stronger than the earth, the water and even death. At the end of the story, the cast sings to the little girl about why they tell the story. She begins to sing the beginning of the story again as the cast sings this final song of the show, "Why We Tell the Story":

And this is why we tell the story:
If you listen very heard you hear her call us
To come share with her our laughter and our tears
And there's mysteries and miracles befall us through the years.

We tell the story, we tell the story!

Life is why we tell the story,
Pain is why we tell the story,
Love is why we tell the story,
Grief is why we tell the story,
Hope is why we tell the story,
Faith is why we tell the story,
You are why we tell the story,

So I hope that you will tell this tale tomorrow
It will help your heart remember and relive
It will help you feel the anger and the sorrow
And forgive

For all the ones we leave
And we believe
Our lives become the stories that we weave.

As I was sitting there in the theatre, completely enchanted by this beautiful story, that last line hit me like a ton of bricks! I've said it a million times, but this time I really understood it even more - our worship tells the story. We re-live the story together, the story of God's salvation history, and by telling the story, acting out the story, re-living the story, we become part of the story ourselves. Our lives become the stories that we weave.

Bob Webber talks about the story of God that we tell and live in our worship. He talks about it every chance he gets - almost as much as he talks about the narcissistic culture that frequently invades our worship.**

And I saw the Resurrection story written all over this delightful musical. Just like I see the Resurrection story written in many great stories, like Harry Potter for example. As Leigh McLeroy writes in a blog entry on Common Grounds Online***:

"I don’t know what J.K. Rowling believes, but here’s what I believe. Harry Potter is a tremendous character, Rowling is a master storyteller, and Harry’s story is as redemptive and rich as they come. And that redemptive richness – its tensions between darkness and light, good and evil, love and jealousy, and its honestly-constructed characters who never, ever hit a false note – resonate with the Great Story, the Gospel Story. Because all the best stories do, whether they mean to, or not."

So - As part of the Worship Planning Team training time, we're going to tell stories. One of the first homework items I'm going to give the class our first week is this: write THE STORY in your own words - be as creative as you want. Then, the next week, during our worship time, we will each share a portion of our stories, and then take the written stories and combine them in a kind of visual collage, that, all put together, tell THE STORY in a rich, tangible, visual way.

I'm going to be thinking and praying over the next few days of other ways we can tell the story. Or, perhaps one of the 'lecture' times will not be a lecture or discussion, but a story-telling-time. Do you have any great ideas for how to tell the story, how to teach a group of frozen-chosen-presbyterians how to tell a good story?

Don't be shy, tell me your story - I need your story too! We have to tell the story together, the old, old story of Jesus and His love!

*I have to admit that there was a time in my life where I had the entire movie memorized and would sing the whole thing for you at the drop of a hat

** For a good laugh at our Culture of I, check out It's All About Me: The Bob Webber Narcissistic Un-Worship Song written by one of the IWS students, Rob Still. Go here for the lyrics.

***Common Grounds Online is a great Christian blog, with many wonderful contributers. And, interestingly enough, the sub-heading for the blog is "Learning and Living the Christian Story."

Invitation response

2007-07-29T23:55:00.000-05:00

I mailed invites last week to 23 people, asking them to participate in the worship planning team. I hoped to get 6 to 7 yeses from that group. I also asked them to respond by today. So far, I have 8 definite yeses, 2 want to participate, but cannot at the time planned. If we change the time to a time they can participate, then the number will be 10. Then, I've received only 4 definite nos. One person has said maybe, but can't commit just yet because her brother is in ICU right now.
(quick prayer for her and her brother: Lord, healer of all ills, I pray that you surround my friend and her brother now with your healing arms. If it is your will that he join you in heaven, comfort his family and give them strength to give you glory in all things. In Jesus' name.)

I've not even heard from 9 people!

The response to this is just overwhelming. I can't even begin to describe how encouraging this is for me. And scary at the same time. Now that all these people are committed, it really has to happen. ACK!!!!

I've added a couple of things to the full 6 week outline which I will change in the earlier post very shortly, as well as those gastly colors in the previous post. They work well in Word when the background is white, but they're blinding in this format.

I know there are a couple of people looking at my blog cause the counter gives you away :). So, please feel free to come out of lurkdom and comment, suggest, encourage, etc. I can use all the encouragement and prayers I can get my hands on, so keep it comin.'

Class #1

2007-07-29T23:51:00.000-05:00

Here is a more fleshed out outline for Class #1

Class 1 notes:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
Explanation of the purpose of the team and training time (15 min)
Timeline and other practical information (5 min)
Remembering exercise – 8 min to think about previous worship experiences followed by discussion (25 min total)
Overview of topics to be covered (5 min)
Distribution of reading and other materials (2 min)
Assignment of breakfast duties (2 min)
Closing prayer (2 min)

Worship:

The Lord be with you

And also with you

Open our lips, oh Lord

And our moths shall proclaim your praise

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit

As it was in the beginning, is now and will be forever

Song

Scripture and perhaps one or two sentences on this scripture

Prayer (either regular, or prayer exercise like in McFee’s book)

Song

Benediction/Sending into study

Explanation of the purpose of the team and training time: The purpose of the training phase for the worship planning team is to equip the members of the team with understanding of and passion for worship of Almighty God. The preparation process will ground the participants in biblical, historical and theological foundations of worship as well as provide resources and tools for planning worship.

What is worship? (Ask the question, and discuss the answers). Worship definitions from different sources:

1. Worship is a verb – Robert Webber

2. 3 ways to examine this put forth by James White:

a. Phenomenological – what exactly do Christians do when they gather to worship.

b. Abstract definitions – what have other scholars said worship is.

c. Key words that Christians use in many languages to describe worship

3. Worship is a celebration of God’s mighty deed of salvation in Jesus Christ – Bob Webber

4. God speaks – we respond

5. Worship is a rehearsal for what it means to live out God’s kingdom here on earth. We learn in worship how to pray, how to sing God’s praises, how to sit at table with our fellow humans, how to share God’s peace with others, how to listen for God’s word in our life and how to respond to that word with actions inspired by that word.

6. Authentic worship is nothing less than a personal encounter with the Living God. – Bob Rognlien. I would add that one encounters the Living God through many different ways, and possibly the greatest way we encounter God is through each other.

7. worship is an act of Thanksgiving

8. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Col 3:15-17

9. It’s a school for learning to celebrate a shared life – Plantinga and Rozeboom in Discerning the Spirits (pg. 125)

10. Worship is a narrative engagement with the Triune God – Plantinga and Rozeboom (pg. 126)

11. Ascribing worth to God. Worship is an encounter with God in response to God’s promised presence in Jesus Christ (through the power of the Holy Spirit [my addition]) – Stake, The ABCs of Christian Worship

12. Worship is personal – it is your response to God’s initiative. Worship is communal – God’s call is to all people, and we respond to God through relationships with one another. God is a relationship – Father, Son, Holy Spirit.

13. worship flows from the deepest human impulse – Byars, Christian Worship, pg 2

14. Christian worship celebrates Christ’s victory over death and evil through his crucifixion and resurrection.

What does it mean to participate:

1. definition from the Oxford English Dictionary on-line:

a. 1) The action or fact of having or forming part of something; the sharing of something.

b. 2) The fact or condition of holding or sharing something in common; partnership, fellowship.

c. 3) The process or fact of sharing in an action, sentiment, etc.; (now esp.) active involvement in a matter or event, esp. one in which the outcome directly affects those taking part.

What does it mean to participate in worship? (Ask the question and discuss the answers):

1. Do exercise described in Jean’s paper. Ask two people to stand and greet each other as general acquaintances on the street. Then, ask one of them to show honor to the other. Finally, ask one of them to worship the other. – discuss the difference in action between the three. See the growing involvement of more energy, more of the body, more passion directed toward the one being greeted, then honored and then worshiped.

2. Participation in worship is more than just the bare definition of participation. It is an intentional desire to take part in. Not just physically or mentally go through the motions, but an intention to meet God in worship

3. Worship “is an intentional response of praise, thanksgiving and adoration to the God, the One revealed in the Word, made known and accessible to us in Jesus Christ and witnessed in our hearts through the Holy Spirit.” Morganthaler, 47)

4. “The personal motive for worship is crucial to the level of participation experienced therein.” Erickson (3)

5. Participation is the intention on the part of the worshiper, is a relationship between us and God and us and each other instead of a one way street (the performance mentality), participation stems not from a desire to get something, but to respond to something – God’s initiation in our lives.

If that’s what it means to participate in worship, then what responsibility lies on us as a worship planning team? As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink. Ultimately, a persons level of participation is up to them and the Holy Spirit. But, we have a responsibility to provide space, encouragement and tools to the congregation – we have to lead the horse to the water. If our worship services encourage passivity, then the congregation will learn to be passive. Our culture of entertainment teaches people that already, so we must work to overcome that lethargy.

Remembering exercise:

1. recall – recall a corporate worship experience that had an impact on you. Describe the event in as much detail as you can.

2. reflect – what about that worship service had an impact on you? What meanings did you take from it? Was your life outside of worship somehow changed? Why do you think it sticks with you today?

3. result – what can we say about worship based upon these reflections? What do these experiences and reflections tell us is important about and in worship?

Throughout the next 5 weeks we’ll look at worship from a couple of different standpoints:

1. Biblical – what does the Bible have to say about worship and participation. If we truly are hotwired to worship God, then surely the Bible will have some clear direction for us.

2. Theological – this is closely tied to Biblical in that it is our understanding of what God says about worship.

3. Historical – what does 2000+ years of worship have to say to us about worship, what elements of worship have stood the test of time and various cultural settings? And, more specifically, what does our Reformed tradition tell us about worship. What did Calvin think about it? What does the Book of Order say about it, and how is that different from or the same as what Presbyterian Churches have done in the past and are doing now.

Then, we’ll explore the structure of worship, elements of worship, the arts (music, dance, visual, language, etc) in worship and tools for worship planning.

Each week we’ll begin with a time of worship. If it’s true that worship “is the summit toward which the activity of the Church is directed… it is the font from which all her power flows” and it is true that the “chief end of man is to worship and enjoy God forever” then what we do here in class must begin with worship and be empowered by the Holy Spirit through our worship so that the worship we work toward to eventually design will be guided and empowered by God in celebration of Jesus Christ through the power of the Holy Spirit.

In preparation for next week, please read…

Each week, I’d like for 2 (or more, depending on the number of people present) people to volunteer to bring breakfast for the group. Sharing a meal together as we worship and study will help to bond our community. Each person taking a turn to provide the meal will foster participation and investment in the group. Sign up on the sheet indicating which day you’ll provide the meal. It doesn’t need to be fancy, but brought with the understanding that you are helping to nourish this particular part of the Body of Christ.

Color key:

Gathering – coming together as the body of Christ in worship
Word – lecture, group discussion of days topic
Response – activity that stems from that word
Sending – preparation and instructions for the week and next meeting, closing prayer

Outline of 6 week study sessions

2007-07-24T21:33:00.000-05:00

Class Outline:

Through out the whole 6 weeks we must remember to begin and end with God. Worship is first and foremost about, to, for, directed at and focused on God.

Major areas I want to cover: biblical foundation for worship, historical foundation of worship with focus on the reformed tradition, book of order, order of worship/elements of worship, church year, artistic expression in worship, worship planning tools

Minor areas that should be found throughout in the various major areas: multi-generational worship, worship that is friendly to families,

Elements to be included in each class session:

Prayer
Worship
Evaluation of the previous Sunday’s worship service – not in order to make changes, or to criticize, but to get into the practice of directed observation and meaning creating (see Jane Rogers Vann)
All subjects will have as a focal point the importance of participation, definition of participation and evaluation of participation

Overarching goal for this team (not the same as for the project):

Class 1, August 14^th:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
Explanation of the purpose of the team and training time (15 min)
Timeline and other practical information (5 min)
Bryan’s exercise – 15 min to think about previous worship experiences followed by discussion (25 min total)
Overview of topics to be covered (5 min)
Distribution of reading and other materials (2 min)
Assignment of breakfast duties (2 min)
Closing prayer (2 min)

Class 2, August 21^st:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
Discussion of homework (focused on post-modern movement and the church’s need to keep up with the changing world)
Biblical and theological foundations for worship
Evaluation and discussion of Sunday, August 19^th
Explanation/distribution of home study for next week
Closing Prayer

Class 3, August 28^th:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
Historical Foundations, with focus on the Reformed Tradition
Church Year and formational possibilities
Evaluation and discussion of Sunday, August 26^th
Explanation/distribution of home study for next week
Closing Prayer

Class 4, September 4^th:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
Book of Order and what it says about worship
Elements of worship and worship structure (4 fold and other possibilities)
Evaluation and discussion of Sunday, September 2^nd
Explanation/distribution of home study for next week
Closing Prayer

Class 5, September 11^th:

Welcome and opening worship time (15 min)
The arts in worship (visual, musical, dance, language etc.)
Worship planning tools
Evaluation and discussion of Sunday, September 9^th
Explanation/distribution of home study for next week
Closing Prayer

Class 6, September 18^th

Welcome
Worship panning tools and processes
Review, questions, clean up
Closing worship (30 min)

Random thoughts as I study

2007-07-20T10:49:00.001-05:00

No rhyme or reason, and less organization to this post... just random thoughts. (I won't bore you with excuses for my long absence)

Participation is a matter of intention. You can physically go through motions of standing, sitting, talking, singing, dancing, parading, eating, bowing, etc and not participate. When I talk about participation I mean an attitude of intentional participation. “Worship is an expression of the community, not something done to the people by the worship leaders… I have been privileged to experience the electricity of a congregation that enters the sanctuary anticipating how God will meet them in a unique way. Worship there and elsewhere overflows with life in the Spirit.” *

I know this is true because of my experience at IWS. And, it doesn’t happen there because of great planning, perfect music, and just the right structure. It happens there because every person walking into that space is expecting to worship God. Not expecting to be entertained, or even expecting to come out of it a better person – a noble sentiment and one not without foundation. But, each person enters into worship knowing that they are, themselves, worshiping God in the community, fully participating to the best of their abilities at that given moment.

As time continues to move and we leave our modern sensibilities behind more and more every day, we must be present to the new understanding of the world around us in this postmodern time. We do not change the gospel – it is the one constant. We change how we can access the richness of the gospel, we change how we experience and change how we incorporate the gospel into our lives. No longer will the model of a good sermon and a couple of songs work. It worked before – lives were changed, the world was changed and progress was made toward the fulfillment of God’s kingdom on earth. Martin Luther King, Jr. is the perfect example of how wonderfully the gospel worked in the modern era. That man could speak and move mountains! The people listened to his words and their hearts were moved to action. It’s not working any more, though. More and more we need to not only hear the gospel, but to experience. We don’t experience it any more just through our ears and intellect. For truth to speak to us, we must hear it, feel it, taste it, see it, DO IT. We crave to taste and see that the Lord is good. Instead of trying to parse out every tiny piece of God, we need more and more the mystery of God.

*Greg Ogen, The New Reformation: Returning the Ministry to the People of God (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1990) as quoted by Steve Zerbe in his thesis, Integrating a Strategic Worship Advisory Team in the Worshiping Community of Warsaw, Indiana Wesleyan Church (Thesis for the Robert Webber Institute for Worship Studies, 2004, page 112.

Definition of Participation

2007-05-14T00:06:00.000-05:00

I’m focused right now on finding a good definition of participation. What does it really mean to participate in worship. I would love to hear some of your thoughts about participation. Here are some of the different definitions that I have found in various publications:

From Dr. Constance Cherry’s lecture, “From Passive to Participative Worship”, found on the Calvin Institute of Christian Worship website

She defines participation as:

to take part in
to share in
to partner in.

What is a partner?

A person who shares or takes part with another
a companion in dancing (a dance partner)
or a player on the same side in a game (a contest partner).

Craig Douglas Erickson has this to say about participation in his book Participating in Worship: History, Theory and Practice, though it’s not a definition per se:

“The personal motive for worship is crucial to the level of participation experienced therein. The starting point for authentic participation is the individual Christian’s own heartfelt and genuine response of praise and thanksgiving before the presence of God… Participatory worship is founded upon pietas or piety – that personal trust in and reverence for God that inclines the heart to true worship and devotion. Piety is that quality of openness to God that is itself a gift of the Spirit of god. Without piety participatory forms of worship are of little avail. This is not to deny the evangelistic potential of the liturgy,, which is considerable. Nor is it to suggest that liturgy is powerless to prompt and awaken the disposition that is proper to worship. Rather it is to emphasize the fact that major responsibility for participation in worship lies with the individual Christian. This responsibility involves much more than a momentary or nostalgic desire or the fulfillment of one’s Lord’s Day obligation. Authentic participation in worship arises out of the heart that is actively engaged in the Christian life with all of its moral and spiritual demands, including preparation for worship through prayer, Bible study, meditation, and fasting. (Erickson 3-4)

Sally Morganthaler, in her book Worship Evangelism: Inviting the Unbeliever into the Presence of God has this to say: (some of it is my paraphrase):

“[Worship is] the act and attitude of wholeheartedly giving ourselves to God, spirit, soul, and body. Worship is simply the expression of our love for God, which Jesus said, should involve all our heart, mind and physical strength” (Morganthaler, Worship Evangelism, 47, quoting Gerrit Gustafson)

“Thus Christian worship is not only offering all that we are to a Holy God (spirit). It is an intentional response of praise, thanksgiving, and adoration to The God, the One revealed in the Word, made known and accessible to us in Jesus Christ and witnessed in our hearts through the Holy Spirit (truth).” (Morganthaler, 47)

Morganthaler emphasizes that worship is not a one way street. It is a relationship, one that requires action. We can sit and listen to good music, a good speech, etc. and perhaps be inspired to worship, but worship and inspiration are not the same thing. “Corporate worship does not just inspire and hope that people will do more than activate their brain cells. It provides definitive opportunities for response.” (Morganthaler, 49).

It seems to me that some recurring themes among these definitions are:

Intention on the part of the worshipper
relationship instead of a one way street
that the participation stems not from a desire to get something, but in response to something – God’s initiation in our lives.

Ok – your turn!

Friday Five

2007-05-10T23:04:00.000-05:00

Ok, this is totally off topic, but I've recently joined a blogring called RevGalsBlogPals. Check out the nav bar over there on the right hand side. Anyway, every Friday, they do a Friday Five and it's just a fun little game that lots of the bloggers in the ring play. It's a good way to float around the ring and meet other (mostly) women involved in a Christian vocation. So, on with the game:

There are two types of people in the world, morning people and night owls. Or Red Sox fans and Yankees fans. Or boxers and briefs. Or people who divide the world into two types of people and those who don't. Let your preferences be known here. And if you're feeling verbose, defend your choices!

1. Mac? or PC?
Well, I've been a Mac user for a number of years, and have always turned my nose up at PCs. But, then I married my sweet husband who just happens to work in the IT field and mostly on PCs. He can work with a Mac, but all the computers in our house are PC. So, now I guess I'm reluctantly a PC user. But, I still think Macs are much sexier :)

2. Pizza: Chicago style or New York style.
I love any kind of pizza, thick or thin crust. Just depends on what city I'm in, I guess.

3. Brownies/fudge containing nuts:
An abomination unto the Lord. The nuts take up valuable chocolate space. Not only that, but nuts impart an odd flavor to the brownie/cookie/fudge. I don't care if I can pick them out. I CAN STILL TASTE THE NUTS!!! EEEEUUUUWWWWW

4. Do you hang your toilet paper so that the "tail" hangs flush with the wall, or over the top of the roll.
Over the top. Does anyone actually hang it the other way on purpose?

5. Toothpaste: Do you squeeze the tube wantonly in the middle, or squeeze from the bottom and flatten as you go?
Well, I flatten as I go - my husband does not. So, I have to work overtime to keep the tube in proper form.

Bonus: Share your favorite either/or.
hmmmm Sacrament or Ordinance? Well... both :) Hey, I'm a Disciple of Christ (ordinance) working at a PC(USA) (sacrament).

Inertia, lethargy, sloth, laziness, whatever

2007-05-08T18:59:00.000-05:00

The last month has almost been a total waste for me. And there is no excuse other than my own sloth. Yep - that's one of them 7 deadly sins. Never thought much about sloth, other than wonder why in the world it was a deadly sin, until the DWS 704 The Sacred Actions and Ministries of Christian Worship class.

Our esteemed professor, Dr. Carla Waterman talked about sloth and why it is so deadly - I felt like she was talking directly at me with a piercing directness into my deepest heart. She described it from the standpoint of hope (I hope I can do her description justice). Hope, she described, is like an IV drip that keeps us functioning. We hope (trust) in God and that regular nourishment of hope keeps our head up and our faith strong during difficult times, and fills us with joy during the good times. But, when we give in to sloth, it's as if we turn down that hope drip by saying "Oh, I can't do that, that thing that God wants me to do, so I'm gonna do something else (something I think I can do without God's help, like watch tv, or do busy work to cover up the sloth, or sleep, etc)." We keep turning down that drip (we stop trusting that we can do what God wants us to do), until eventually we just turn it off all together. I go through stages as I slowly turn off the hope where at first I'm just a little too tired to do what I'm supposed to do, then I'm weary and feel emotionally drained and don't want to do the job, finally landing solidly into despair and it's all I can do to get up and function at all. And when I get there, I've essentially turned away from God and said, "I don't need You, You can't help me, and basically I don't believe You are even there to begin with." And that, my friends, is why sloth is a deadly sin.
I've been to that point of despair, and only by the grace of God did I come back from it. I was suspicious that perhaps that despair was reality, and that my faith was just a coverup for the truth about this world. But, when Carla described sloth in this way, as a sin, I realized that she was absolutely right! My despair was a sin - it was an evil that I had allowed to take over my heart and trick me into a falsehood. But, now that I know this, I can see it coming and (hopefully) make choices that will lead away from that downward path and keep holding on to that hope.
Lately, I've been sliding down, as evidenced by my lack of progress on this thesis and by my growing reluctance to even work on it. I even heard myself say yesterday that I was ready to give up because I can't do it. Next thing you know, I'll end up back at that "You can't help me, You don't even exist." But, this time, I have caught myself. I will not let the big Sloth monster take hold again.

So, this morning, I woke up in time to start working again. I've decided that I really do want to go with my original purpose statement:

The purpose of this project is to address the passive nature of our current worship services by designing services that would allow and encourage more participation by the congregation through a trained worship planning team. Worship will therefore support the possibility of transformed lives through the congregants’ participation in the act of worship.

Instead of the newer one:

The purpose of this project is to explore the connection between participatory worship and transformation in the lives of the congregants. Does participatory worship create more fertile opportunity for God’s transformation than worship that is passive?

Here's why - I do want to explore the connection between participatory worship and transformation precisely because I do believe that participatory worship creates more fertile ground for God's transformation that passive worship. I cannot, however, measure transformation within the scope and time frame of this project. What I can measure is if we were able, as a team, to create worship services that allowed for more participation from the congregants. I can even, to a certain extent, measure some of the congregants' level of participation. I won't measure how they 'liked' or 'disliked' the services because that's asking about their preferences, and that's not important to this project. I will ask if they participated, if they felt they had opportunities and safe space in which to do so, how they participated, etc.

Ultimately, and I hope to make this point very clear in my paper, participation is not an end-all-be-all fix. Participation doesn't guarantee squat. Only God transforms lives and God can choose to transform lives anyway He chooses. God can make children out of rocks if He so chooses. What I'd like to show in my research paper (with biblical, theological, and historical support) is that worship that is participatory (the whole person is engaged) helps the worshiper come to a place where he/she is ready and open for God to transform. Passive worship (really quite an oxymoron, don't you think?) doesn't do that, and in fact could even be a hindrance. With that foundation, then I want to develop this worship planning team to create worship services that are participatory because of this belief.

Talking in circles, I know, but perhaps you (and maybe even I) understand a little more clearly where I'm going with this. Perhaps now I can get past this inertia and not slide down the sloth chute. Only with the grace of God...

In Memory of Bob Webber

2007-04-27T18:07:00.000-05:00

Today, at 6:10 p.m. Robert E. Webber left this life and his baptism is now complete. Bob was a teacher, mentor and friend. His work for Christ in this world is far reaching. He has taught so many people about the beauty and holiness of worship. He has inspired in the hearts of many a passion for God's people and a passion to lead God's people in true, vibrant, transformational worship. For those of you who don't know Bob, I will include his bio below, taken from the Robert E. Webber Institute for Worship Studies website.

IWS is where my life intersects with Bob's. From the very first book I read for this degree, my life has changed, and how I do my job has changed. Bob, and the Institute has made my job infinitely more difficult, and infinitely more rewarding. A favorite saying of the students of IWS is that Bob has ruined us. We are ruined for anything other than worship that is rich with Scripture, deep in connection with the Body of all times, pregnant with escatological hope, awe-full of God's beautiful creation, joyfully Eucharistic in response to Jesus death and resurrection and wide open to the powerful wind of the Holy Spirit.

Thank you, Bob for being an instrument for God, for trusting your life to God's will, and for sharing Christ's love through your expansive and graceful work.

What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died - more than that, who was raised to life - is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nore demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31-35, 37-39)

Dr. Robert E. Webber was born in the Congo of missionary parents, and was raised in the Philadelphia area. He earned the Th.D. from Concordia Theological Seminary, and taught at Covenant College. From 1968 to 2000 he served as Professor of Theology at Wheaton College. He has been appointed William R. and Geraldine D. Myers Professor of Ministry at Northern Baptist Theological Seminary, beginning in the fall of 2000. Bob Webber started The Institute for Worship Studies in 1993, and is noted for his "Renew Your Worship!" Workshops across North America. He is the author of numerous books in worship and worship renewal, including Evangelicals on the Canterbury Trail, Worship Is a Verb and Worship Old and New. He served as editor of the seven-volume The Complete Library of Christian Worship (Hendrickson, 1993). Among his latest books are Ancient-Future Faith: Rethinking Evangelicalism for Postmodern World (Baker, 1999) and The Younger Evangelicals: Facing the Challenge of the New World (Baker, 2002).

Approved... sort of

2007-04-26T10:14:00.000-05:00

So, yesterday I received the official approval of my thesis proposal from Dr. Borchert after I made a couple of changes. I was going to post the new version on the web page, but for reasons I'm about to explain, I'm going to wait for yet another revision. Last night I had a long conversation with my senior pastor about the project. He and his wife (both equally brilliant scholars and good friends) both took the proposal apart and asked for even more clarification before I proceed with the project. It was painful to go through their comments and realize that I still have a lot of work to do before I do the actual work. But, it was also quite a relief in a sense because knowing that if I do this hard job of really refining and focusing my number 1 goal, then the whole project will be more manageable and more enjoyable. Right now, looking at my original proposal, I feel a lot of fear and doubt about my ability to pull off what my proposal says I'm going to do. But, with the changes and focus that I plan to make in the next 2 days, I think I'll feel a lot better and more confident in my ability to do the job.

so, I hope to have a new proposal posted in a few days. The more work I do now, the easier it will be in the long run.

Here's one change that I'm starting to make. My original "purpose statement" is this:

The purpose of this project is to address the passive nature of our current worship services by designing services that would allow and encourage more participation by the congregation through a trained worship planning team. Worship will therefore support the possibility of transformed lives through the congregants' participation in the act of worship.

The new one, which is still in progress but which I think is moving closer to the really refined and focused goal of the project is this:

The purpose of this project is to explore the connection between participatory worship and transformation in the lives of the congregants. Does participatory worship create more fertile opportunity for God’s transformation than worship that is passive?

Well, that's where I am now...

Thesis Proposal

2007-04-18T00:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, for those of you that are interested, you may view my Thesis Proposal here. It has been approved by my thesis adviser and I'm awaiting approval from the thesis director. As significant sections of the thesis get written I will post them on that site for your viewing pleasure. Always feel free to comment either here or in an email to me on anything that you like or dislike, suggestions or inspiration you may have. If you know of any references that you think might be helpful to me that I don't have in my bibliography please share them.

As always, your prayers are a gift and help sustain me through this process.

First big hurdle

2007-04-17T23:45:00.000-05:00

I almost forgot how to log on to write a post! Shame on me.

Tonight I emailed my proposal to my Thesis Directors after receiving an approval from my Thesis Adviser this morning. Yippee....

Now the real work begins.

Here's my plan - I would like to post at least 3 times a week with at least a report of how much time I'm spending on it. My posts may not be very substantive at this point, but I need to have some motivation for working on the project every day for at least an hour a day.

As soon as I figure out how to do it, I will post a link to my Proposal in case anyone wants to read it. If you do read it, I'd love your feedback.

structure or matrix or something like that

2007-03-22T22:31:00.000-05:00

Hello out there - sorry I've been absent. I'll maybe explain later. But to the point - I think I have an over-arching matrix for my project. This is very basic, but I think how I want to structure this whole thing, which means that even though I just turned in my proposal to my adviser, I'm going to change it a bit. So, the following statements are a flow chart, if you will, going from big picture down to focused point:

Reformed theology that the defining purpose for humankind is to love and enjoy God.

How do we love and enjoy God? Primarily, we do that through worship - worship that is enacted with clarity, intentionality, and intensity.

How do we worship with clarity, intentionality, and intensity? By thoroughly and with our whole heart, mind and strength participating in the worshiping community.

How do we participate? One way to help our congregations to participate is through prayerful, thoughtful and creative worship planning.

How do I think WPC can plan this kind of worship? Through a committed, bonded, group of gifted individuals who have come together to study and pray and plan this kind of worship.

This matrix I've laid out does not mean that this is the only way - it's just the way that I've chosen to address worship at WPC through my thesis. My problem statement and stuff will stay the same - I will still be addressing passive worship through a worship planning team, but passive vs. participatory worship is only one piece in the puzzle of how we as Christians can and should love and enjoy God forever.

gosh, the days are slipping by

2007-02-17T00:28:00.000-06:00

Well, another week has come and gone and I've not accomplished much on my thesis. Though, I do have a good excuse this time. I've been a bit preoccupied with things this week. On Monday morning, our Assistant Director of Music Ministries underwent a kidney transplant, receiving a kidney from her daughter. So, Monday, I was at the hospital, hanging out with the family and many church members. Then, every day, I've been up at the hospital part of the day and helping to keep things going at church the rest of the time. My head has been far from my thesis. Monday night, I was talking with Marilee, who despite the fact she had a new foreign body hanging out in her side, was feeling like a million dollars compared to earlier that day. She commented that the outpouring of love from everyone at church has been so wonderful. I mused that it must be pretty awful to go through something as drastic and scary as a kidney transplant and not have this wonderful thing we call the Body of Christ to surround you. I just don't know how I would make it through even one day without this community. I know the big gift from God is the whole grace thing and eternal life, but this gift of community really rocks!

So, I did get some work done today. I haven't read much in the last week, but I did write some on the proposal. Well, some of it was on the proposal, and some was just writing to organize my thoughts. As I was lying in bed this morning in that weird half awake, half asleep state, my brain wandered through all the church history that I could remember and mused about the cyclical nature of worship and how it vacillates between participatory and passive, pretty much in lock step with renewal and whatever the opposite of that is. I can't think this late what word I want there. Sluggish mire? So, when I finally realized it was time to get my butt out of the bed, I wrote all those thoughts down. They'll probably never see the light of day, but it was good organizing for my brain, nonetheless.

When I was developing the thesis idea in Florida back in January, I had trouble figuring out what the actual thesis would be - would it be about the advantages of designing worship by team or would it be about passive vs participatory worship? It has become so clear over the past week or so that my big battle cry word this year is going to be Participate! That's definitely the thesis. Now, I just have to get busy with it.

So, March 1st is coming fast and I really want to get my proposal turned into my advisor by that date. Listen carefully now... that grinding noise you hear is my nose... um... on the grindstone.

Look out Nike...

2007-02-10T22:27:00.000-06:00

This evening, I'm going through my house, turning off lights in preparation for bed when I come across this pamphlet sitting on the LBP*. This is one of those fliers you get from local churches telling about their latest and greatest worship services, or the 7 steps to salvation, etc. etc. Anyway, it was advertising their new service where you can 'experience worship as it once was.' I'm assuming they mean they're offering a service that is supposed to resemble worship in the first century or so. This flier is not the first one I've seen. Many churches are adding these types of services and frankly, this last bit of advertising kind of irritated me. My first thought when I read it was, 'Oh, there's another church jumping on that bandwagon.' Geeze, when I actually read that written down, it seems a little harsh and bitter. Really, I'm not bitter, I promise. Just sometimes I get a little sick of all the hype. Why do we need to try to worship like this church or that church, the first Christians or the Christians of the 8th century, or last century, or 50 years ago, or tomorrow's Christians? I know this sounds kinda like "can't we all just get along?" but, can't we just worship?

Just worship!

*this is what we call the piece of furniture next to the front door where we put things for Lack of a Better Place

Is it a lack of passion?

2007-02-05T22:05:00.000-06:00

So, I'm back on track. Today I have been reading from Ronald P Byars The Future of Protestant Worship: Beyond the Worship Wars and some things really grabbed me. Some of it was kind of the same 'ol same 'ol discussion about why we're in the midst of these worship wars and what are people looking for and why can't the old people and the young people just get along. But, some things jumped out at me and made me think a little further than other books I've read so far.

In chapter 2, Byars lables a section "The Playfulness of Worship" where he compares worship to children playing dress up or acting out a drama. He says that when we play, we step out of ourselves and even loose track of time as if we get caught up in another world where we are completely present to the moment. Worship at it's best is like that - we loose track of time and of the worries of our world - our whole bodies are involved, not just our heads. Byars comparison reminded me that when I was younger (and still to some extent) I wished I were Catholic. What I longed for (and still do) is the physical nature of the worship I saw in the few Catholic services I attened with friends as a child. I wanted to cross myself, kneel when I prayed, bow before the cross before sitting in my pew, walk forward for communion, etc. I didn't really understand why at the time, I just was facinated by that kind of worship and wondered why we didn't do that over at University Christian Church. Now, I know what it was I was longing for. I've never been a very good passive obeserver. I can't just listen to music, I have to participate in it; I was always one of those annoying students that had to say something during class discussions; I have a hard time staying quiet while watching a movie at the theater. Church didn't give much opportunity for me to participate - it was just a matter of sitting down quietly and listening. I was longing for a worship that allowed me to participate fully and not just from the neck up. Byars asks the question if worship "that respects body and soul, heart and mind" in a church "which is capable of taking by the hand those who hunger and thirst, and [lead] them to the crucified and risen Savior" could be labled 'contemprary' or 'tracitional?'
Chapter 3 is on 'traditional' worship - and with many other voices, asks what in the world these labels can possibly mean. He holds the same idea found in What Are the Essentials of Christian Worship that the traditions that matter most, that have managed to withstand time and all the abuses we've heaped on to them are the Word, Baptism and Eucharist. These three elements are essential to Christian worship and are the 'tradition' we should be holding to. I'm going to rabbit trail here for a bit - One statement jumped out at me and allowed me to let go of a fairly strong held idea. Byars writes "Bath refers to baptism, wheter preceded by teaching or following by teaching" (Byars, 40). Last semester I did my project on baptism, helping parents to prepare for their infant's baptism in particular. One of the reccomendations I made to our session was that baptism should follow the service of the word and not come before. My argument (supported by the Book of Order and many other sources) was that baptism is our response to the Word and that by placing the baptism before the Word we do damage to the structure of the worship by bowing to convenience. However, Byars' statement opened my eyes to something I had failed to recognize, that now seems so obvious. The Presbyterian church baptizes infants with the theological understanding that in baptism (an outward sign of grace) God acts first, choosing us before we ever choose God. We recognize that while God's gift of grace and our acceptance of that grace may be separated by time, they are one and the same event. The Presbyterian church baptizes infants before they even understand a single word of the Gospel and then pledges to teach that Word to the child as he or she grows with the hope that one day that child will accept that grace already extended to them by God. Well, why then couldn't the baptism come before the service of the Word - so perfectly illustrating that God's grace comes to us before we even hear about it - THEN we hear the good news and accept it. I don't know why I didn't see this possiblity so clearly before. I was just hell-bent on the idea that the only proper place of the baptism in the worship service was after the Word.
One section in chapter 4, on contemprary worship, really grabed me this afternoon. Many of the arguments between 'traditional' and 'contemporary' worship that are put forth talk about how the young people today just don't like the old music, want their worship to more closely resemble the music and other entertainment items that fill their everyday life, etc. etc. etc ad naseum. And on the other side of it is the arugment that the old people are just stuck in their ways and can't understand the new paradigm shift from modernism to postmodernism, etc. I'm not necessarily refuting these arguments - there is definitly truth to these statements. Has there ever been a time in the history of the world where the young had the old have not been divided over most things in life? Byars points to another reason for the 'generational divide' and that reason is passion. He sites an article by Rodger Nishioka published in the journal Reformed Liturgy and Music (vol. 32, no.1 1998) that interviewed young adults about worship. Two big themes became clear - 1) young people who were going to church were not necessarily dissatisfied with worhsip as much as the lack of connection with other members. They longed for small group interaction and relationship. This part of church life is a huge focus of many of the contemporary church models like Willow Creek, Vinyard, and Calvary Chapel. 2) and this is the one that finally put a finger on what I have not found the words to describe: passion - or lack thereof. While Byars says this is a misperception on the part of the young people in question, they say the cannot discern any passion in their parents generation. Worship is too cerebral, the faith is too 'low-profile.' "This kind of low-profile faith, tending toward a generic religiosity simply does not commend itself to people who are looking for a faith that claims them in heart and mind." I think it shows up in how church so many times is something people do for an hour on Sunday morning, but has no obvious impact on the rest of the week. Church for many people, it seems to me, is just something to do because that's what your supposed to do. If that's the case, no wonder our churches are dwindling. Perhaps that worked fine when we lived in a Christian society, but we don't any more. As each generation as grown up and seen less and less passion in the lives of the 'Christians' they had less and less reason to go to church - other ideas and religions seemed to grow and attract people away from the Gospel. I know these are rather blanket and generic statements - this is really an exaggerated focus on mainstream American Protestant churches. You know, you look at your parents and what seems to you as a huge, unforgivable character flaw, is really not as big or as bad as you think. But, then again, I think Byars hit on something important here - worship that is only cerebral, where you sit down, facing the back of someone elses head, listen to a sermon and maybe sing a few hymns, worship that doesn't get the whole person into the act feels certainly passionless. At least to me. Maybe that's why I wanted to be Catholic when I was younger - I wanted what looked like passion to me. I know now that passionlessness can take the form of extremely physical worship - it too can become routine and pointless, this time only offering worship for the body and not the mind.

Passion, participation, transformation, true communion with God and with the Body of Christ - these are elements that I pray will be a part of the worship we plan, for this project and for the continuing worship life of this congregation. I know how powerful this kind of worship can be 'cause I've experienced it at IWS, at Grace Anglican church in Florida, yesterday at the Women's Retreat worship service, and other places and times in my life. It's not about 'traditional' and 'contemprary.' It's about worship with the whole church, past, present and future and with our whole hearts, minds, souls and strengths - like David in front of the Ark.

That whole accountability thing

2007-02-02T09:21:00.000-06:00

I guess this is where the accountability comes in... I have accomplished absolutely nothing this week. For a variety of reasons ranging from the very best of excuses to the lamest of them all. After the women's retreat this weekend, however, I'm back to the grind stone.

Random Scribblings

2007-01-26T15:26:00.000-06:00

Ok, these are just random thoughts that I've had over the past two days while reading a couple of different books. They're not really related to each other in any way, just thoughts I want to be sure not to forget:

(musing while reading Authentic Worship in a Changing Culture) In my thesis about the necessity of participation I should spend some time on the social reasons we don't participate. What in the broader culture makes it difficult to participate? Are we being re-programmed by society to be passive consumers? Were we originally programmed to be active participants, especially when it comes to worshiping God?
So, it's not just about participation, is it? It's a study about what happens in Christian Worship. How do we plan worship that is more than a series of events that don't mean much. How do we plan worship that tells the story in such a way that we meet God in His temple? How do we facilitate worship that is a community gathered around the word and table to be fed and nourished by God? AND WHY IS THIS IMPORTANT ANYWAY?!?!
Two books, What Are the Essentials of Christian Worship and Christian Worship:Glorifying and Enjoying God, state this important point - Jesus is made known throughout the New Testament (Luke's Emmaus Road story for example) to the people through preaching the Word and through breaking the bread. These two elements are necessary for the other

Maybe I'll get to answer all these questions at some point.

Insights from a book

2007-01-23T21:34:00.000-06:00

Today, I've been reading Christian Worship: Glorifying and Enjoying God by Ronald P. Byars. It is part of the Foundations of Christian Faith series published by the Office of Theology and Worship of the Presbyterian Church (USA). I chose it because Byars is a theologian in the PC(USA) and I need to have dialogue with some theologians in my tradition for this paper. Additionally, it's a good book. I'm halfway through and so far he has talked about

ch.1: The point of worship - why do we worship? His argument (and I really have to agree wholeheartedly with him) is that God has hotwired us to worship. That worshiping God is a basic impulse that has flourished (in good and bad ways and every way in between) throughout most of human history. But, according to Byars, in our modern society we've scrambled that impulse with the ever present impulse to get money and buy things. But, even as we work to suppress our instinct to worship, it continues to well up inside of us and now we're seeing a resurgence of a desire for the mystery and real connection with God. He covers a lot of other important stuff in that first chapter, but I don't want to totally give away the whole book
ch. 2: the shape of worship - different styles, tradition versus traditionalism, etc. He talks about the importance of naming God as Trinity, about how Christian worship is rooted in loads of tradition beginning with Jewish Temple and Synagogue worship, and how Christian worship should be a healthy combination between Word and Sacrament.
ch. 3: This one he focuses on the importance of Word and Sacrament, with a brief description of how those two elements came to be in the New Testament church, how it became distorted in the medieval church, the Word loosing out to the Sacrament. Then in the Reformation, despite the reformers original desire to recapture the New Testament ideal of Word and Sacrament, the Sacrament fell by the wayside in favor of the Word. "... the Sacrament, without the Word, can easily slide into superstition. However, it's equally true that the Word, without the Sacrament, can loose its essential character, too." (Byars, 45.)

Sometimes I'm a little put off by his jabs at non-denominational, contemporary, non-traditional churches. I see him trying to paint a balance picture and equally lay out the weaknesses of the more 'traditional' churches (in a North American Protestant last 75 to 100 years sense), but it's not quite equal. Other than that, there is plenty of good stuff here when you overlook what I sense is a (perhaps only slight) bias. I think one of the best points he has made so far is that we worship a God that is bigger than anything we can possibly imagine.

I have to side step and tell about a conversation in our staff meeting today. The staff is also doing the Bible in 90 days together and today met together to talk about it so far. We were asked if we had any problems or struggles (other than drudging through all the rules and sacrifices and begats) with what we had read so far. We're in the middle of Deuteronomy right now. I mentioned that I really struggle with the violence - the Israelites wiping out whole nations of people. That's a hard pill to swallow, especially in times like these when we're at war. One of the staff members said he doesn't like it either but has to just believe that God knows more than we do, and that if he understood everything that God does, then he'd be on the same level as God and what kind of god would that be. That really made a lot of sense to me - it didn't make me feel any better about the violence, mind you, but he had a very good point. As if to make sure I heard his point, shortly after that meeting, I read in Byars book the following in relation to balancing understanding with faith:

"Nevertheless, when we have gathered information, processed it thoroughly, and reached as much understanding as we're likely ever to reach, is it really possible to understand God? And if we could understand God, would God be God? Could we worship and serve a God whom we are capable of comprehending?" (Byars, 28)

Well, I could go on all night...

Posting every day? Perhaps not...

2007-01-21T19:49:00.000-06:00

Ok, I know I said that I would post everyday, and I'm sure the hoards of people reading this blog are so disappointed that I have not held to that promise, but well, sometimes my high aspirations don't hold up in real life.

It's hard to post much during the week because frankly I don't get a whole lot done other than just plain old work. Friday's are 90% of the time reserved for studying, but this week I didn't even have Friday to study. I had to travel to Texas for a concert and other family stuff. However, while I was there, my sister, who's on the faculty at TCU was able to check out about 30 books for me. I plan to "WebberRead" them first to cull out what I need and what I don't. So I have lots of resources for my studies this week. I'll let you know how it goes...

Some thoughts that I had this week while reading Webber's Planning Blended Worship: I should include in my plan for the team continuing education past the initial 6 weeks. This concept was also mentioned in Planning Worship Together, where they even suggested that 15 or 20 min. of each meeting should be devoted to continual study to keep the group fresh and up to date. One thing I won't address in the actual project, but need to keep in mind as I work through this is deciding what kind of turnover we should have in the group, and when new people join the team, do we need to do the 6 weeks training again? Or is there a better way to assimilate them into the group?

One challenge I know I'll have to address is how much do I try to cover in the 6 weeks? How much history, should I try to hold strictly to the 4 fold order, should I find one of the many books I'm using and use it as a template for how to structure the class?

Lots of questions at this stage. Will I ever answer them all? Probably not.

Great inspirational picture

2007-01-13T23:30:00.000-06:00

My husband found this picture for me today to add to the lovely calendar that my classmate Val had made for each of us with inspirational photos and sayings to keep us motivated. I'm hanging this one on my wall!!

All Iced in and no where to go

2007-01-13T23:02:00.000-06:00

Well, we're supposed to be all iced in right now, and there certainly is ice on the ground, but not yet the 'crippling ice storm' that all the news channels are telling us we are in the midst of. We even canceled church tomorrow morning - that's crazy talk! I betcha God shows up for worship tomorrow wondering where the heck we all are. It was supposed to have been sleeting and freezing raining all day long, but none just yet. We had some on Friday, but nothing since then. Oh well, no complaints here. It just means that I get 4 solid days to work on my thesis. (Friday is my day off, so I studied then; Today, everything was canceled, so I'm studying today; same with tomorrow; Monday is a holiday, so that makes 4 empty days with nothing to do but study... well, and memorize a bunch of music for a family show next weekend. and a whole bunch of other stuff I can actually do from home, and really should. ugh... I thought I had all this time. not so much, apparently.)

So, here's what I've been doing (seeing as how this blog is where I'm supposed to be logging my thesis activities): I've searched the local libraries, both public and at universities, for books that I might need. OCU doesn't have squat, OBU has some things, and the Oklahoma City public library only has the non-religious books. So, it looks like I'm gonna have to spend some moola. Today, I read about 90% of this one book called "Designing Worship Together." One big issue cropped up for me today. As I've been thinking about this project and beginning the work towards it, I've had in my mind just the 6 or so weeks we would be studying together and then the 4 weeks we would spend preparing the 4 Sundays in question. Well, this book has made me realize that I've not put any thought to those 4 Sundays in relation to the rest of the year. Does my plan totally ignore the year as a whole? Is it too focused on those 4 Sundays? How can I address this? Do I need to be thinking about what this group will do after the project, or just worry about this project and wait till after it's done to think about its purpose at that point? Should we, in addition to the 4 Sundays formulate a plan for the next year, broad goals over all, but also begin planning Advent while at the same time focusing on the project? Also, instead of planning November in October, should we start the training earlier and have two months to plan for November, giving people perhaps more than a week between planning meetings?

These are some questions that I need to keep in mind as this project takes shape. I'm sure there will be more, but I don't want to forget about the big picture. It would be my hope that out of this project would be a functioning planning team that would look at the year as a whole and plan worship far in advance - much like these books I'm reading are suggesting - not just one month in advance. So, perhaps we need to start together much earlier. Hmmm... it's a head scratcher, all right.

In addition to all this reading I'm doing for the thesis, my church is doing the Bible in 90 Days program, and my husband and I are both participating. Basically, you read approximately 12 pages a day, and in 90 days (well, 88, really) you've read the whole bible. I know what you're thinking - "you're crazy, you already have to read a bijillion pages a day for your thesis, what are you thinking?!?!?!" Well, I see it like this: I'm hoping that reading the bible every day will actually be incredibly helpful and powerful for me. It's kind of like when you tithe. You struggle to pay your bills each month, have to be careful about every penny you spend, so how can you possibly think of giving money to church. Well, God provides and I have found that seemingly miraculously some months there is enough left over to live on after I've returned a portion back to God. So, I figure, if I give some of my reading time to God by reading His Word, then I'll have plenty of energy, eyesight and time left to read the other stuff I'm supposed to be reading.

Ok, i've got 12 pages to read now... Good night.

Flying is no fun

2007-01-10T19:22:00.000-06:00

I'm too tired to blog today. Northwest thought it would be good to have me fly from Jacksonville, Fl. to Detroit, MI. and then to Oklahoma. So, I've been on a plane all day. Got some good reading done, however, in the PFR reForm journal. Not all of it usable.

My list...

2007-01-09T21:18:00.000-06:00

Thesis class completed: check
Thesis proposal worksheet completed: check
Thesis adviser secured: check (Hi Bob)
Thesis fear and dread knocking at the door: check

Actually, I'm doing ok right now. I'm still riding high on the wonderful-ness that is the Tuesday night Healing/Communion service. The Nu class did a fantastic job putting their service together and we were all very blessed by their hard work.

It's a strange place to be standing at this bend in the road. The course work is all done and I'm officially ABT (all but thesis). I've always thought that saying someone was ABD or ABT sounded like they had some kind of disease that wasn't talked about in polite company. Now, I stand at the beginning of the long road ahead - writing and executing the thesis. My adviser said that he found the thesis process to be exactly half of the degree - the course work being the other half. That's just a little bit daunting. I've already put in so much work thus far. Am I really only half way? However, for the first half, I felt like I was climbing a mountain with blindfolds on. Now, I actually feel like I can see most of the trail from here. This just might be doable. Not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but doable.

So, here is my proposed timeline:

Thesis proposal turned into my supervisor: April 1st
Thesis proposal approved by Dr. Borchert: May 1st
Worship Planning Team chosen and committed to the task: May 15th
Chapter 2 approved, course curriculum and pre-course questionnaires written: August 1st
Worship planning team training sessions begin: Around August 15th
Worship planning team planning sessions begin: Around Octber 1st
Worship services conducted: November 4, 11, 18 and 25
First Rough Draft of Thesis turned into to adviser: Feb. 1st
Final Rough Draft of Thesis turned into Dr. Ray for final approval: March 1st
Graduation: June 15th, 2008

If I can get a whole lot of writing done by August 1st, the rest of the paper should pretty much write itself after the project happens.

But now, on to more important matters... I get to see my husband finally in about 20 hours!

2007-01-08T23:22:00.000-06:00

Ok, to get a picture into my profile, apparently I have to post a picture here first. So, here's the one I'm choosing to use. Hopefully this will work...

Welcome to my new blog

2007-01-08T22:26:00.000-06:00

The purpose of this blog is to provide a sort of accountability journal for the work I will do to complete my thesis project for my Doctorate of Worship Studies. My goal with this blog (and I invite you to hold me accountable to it) is to post every day about the progress of my thesis project. Perhaps some of my posts will make it into the thesis itself, or into the evaluative process of the thesis. At any rate, it is my prayer that this blog, and any conversations with you will help keep me on track, focused on Christ and my goal, and positive throughout the process.

First, let me tell you about myself. I am an organist for a church in Oklahoma, though playing organ is only about 10% of my job. I also play the piano, accompany all the ensembles in the church, coordinate the children's music programs, direct one of the children's choirs, co-direct the youth choir, direct one of the handbell choirs and work closely with the rest of the music and ministerial staff to plan worship for our church.

Currently, I am working towards my Doctorate in Worship Studies from the Institute for Worship Studies, in Orange Park, Florida. If you are at all interested in the area of worship studies, I highly recommend this program. They offer both a MWS and a DWS. The past 2 years I have spent on this degree have changed my life, and greatly effected my work in a very positive way. Through IWS God has increased my faith and shown me great mercy and love. I truly feel that God has called me to ministry, to my current place of service and to this graduate program. I have completed all the course work for this degree and now must complete the thesis, and plan to walk in the graduation ceremony on June 15th, 2008.

Now to the thesis. In completion of the DWS we must complete an applied, practical thesis. In other words, our final project cannot be a research paper, but a major project addressing a problem in our current ministry setting. I have one more day left of in-class work here in Florida in preparation for writing the darned thing. We've been at it for 4 days so far, hashing out our ideas and plans with our wonderful professors: Dr. Gerald Borchert and Dr. Keith Ray. They're tough as nails, but that's a good thing. You know that no bad thesis gets through these guys. My classmates have some wonderful ideas and I can't wait to see how their projects turn out.

I know you're dying to know what my project is. Well, here ya go:

Working Title: Planning and Implementing Transformative and Participatory Worship through the Development and Training of a Worship Planning Team at Westminster Presbyterian Church, Oklahoma City, OK.

Biblical sources: Nehemiah 8:8 (dramatic worship affecting congregation – importance of worship being transformational); Acts 2: 37; 1 Chron. 23:3-5 (old testament worship planned by lots of people - argument for team worship planning); 1 Cor. 12:7 (spiritual gifts – argument for team worship planning)

Research method and design (plan and organization; data and how interpreted): Choose a team of about 10 – 12 people of both staff and lay members that will meet together for 5 or 6 training sessions that will guide the group to a thorough understanding of worship and equip them to plan worship. At the end of those 5 or 6 sessions we would then take 4 more sessions to plan 4 worship services (either 4 Sundays in November with a Stewardship/Thanksgiving theme or 4 Sundays in Advent). After those Sundays have past we will meet again for one more session to evaluate the effectiveness or lack thereof of the services.

So, the first step in the journey is to begin writing my thesis proposal. I technically have until June 1st to get an approval, but I would love to have it done way before then.

Please feel free to comment with suggestions, encouragement, resources and prayers.